Match Game Apocalypse!

[Mateus]

I just realized that I haven't hosted a Match Game session since last March! I'm slacking off on the one reason you kind people still tolerate me !

Anyway, since this is the year that the world will end*, the theme will be... kittens! No, wait.... I meant, THE END OF THE WORLD!

*Horrific existence-ending apocalypse may not be available in all states or countries. Consult your local laws and horoscopes for more information.

Here are the rules:

1. I enlist six snopesters to act as Panelists for the contest. This position is unpaid; however, bribery is encouraged.
2. I will PM the Panelists a copy of the five questions for this series. The Panelists will PM me their answers, hopefully before the end of the first round.
3. I will post one round of questions at a time, beginning on Mondays and Thursdays. This gives you three days to answer, or four days for you weekday snopesters who are playing Match Game on your employers' dime.
4. Contestants post their answers in this thread; for each Panelist answer they match, they receive one point.
5. Except in the fifth round, that is; that round is worth a random amount between 2 and 5 points. Contestants must have participated (not necessarily scored) in the first four rounds to qualify for the bonus amount.
6. Answers that require determination will be given to my flatmate for final verdict, and she's a lot more generous than my wife was.
7. In case of tornado: southwest corner of cellar.
8. Winners will be determined by the amount of points awarded, obviously.

This series' prize package includes:
A sweater vest, hand-knit by Rick Santorum himself!
A 2012 commemorative Glenn Beck Gold Dubloon!
An 11 and 3/4 month Mayan calendar featuring Chac Uayab Xoc, the patron god of fishers!
(notice: Employees, moderators, owners, members and anyone who has ever heard of snopes.com are ineligible for prize package)

So with that said, who would like to volunteer to be a Panelist?

[Jay Temple]

(Donkey) Pick me! Pick me!

[GenYus234]

Originally Posted by Mateus

8. Winners will be determined by the amount of points awarded, obviously.

Awarded in general or awarded to that snopester?

So with that said, who would like to volunteer to be a Panelist?

Me!

[Mateus]

That's two!

[Chloe]

If I volunteer, I won't get that santorum sweater.

[ToadMagnet]

Since paneling is vertical, I assume panelists don't have to submit a planking photo in order to qualify? If not, I volunteer.

Toad"Which way is up, anyway?"Magnet

[MapleLeaf]

I'll do it!

[Canuckistan]

I'll also volunteer.

[Roadie]

Me! Me! Pick Me!

[MacLloyd]

Dang... Am I too late? Who cares... "Waves hand wildly" Ooh Ooh ... Mister Mateus, Mister Mateus!

MacLloyd

[diddy]

If there is still room I'll volunteer. I don't know which celebrity I would represent since my last go was so terrible.

[Mateus]

It was either Confucius, Mark Twain, or Paula Deen who said, "Don't start an internet game on a Monday, if that Monday is a Federal holiday, y'all, and you access the internet at a public library. Butter." So with that having been said, this edition will begin on Thursday. Here are your panelists:

First, John Cusack starred in a terrible movie based on his calendar system's uneventful expiration... Jay Temple!

Second, Patmos Island exile since last Tuesday... GenYus234!

Third, you might remember her one-night-only appearance on Broadway as Gozer The Gozerian, Gozer The Destructor, Gozer The Traveler, and that really huge Stay-Puft Marshmallow Man... ToadMagnet!

Fourth, his battle with the Midgard Serpent, Jörmungandr, during the Ragnarok was talked about all around the world... MapleLeaf!

Fifth, the Devourer of Worlds who travels the universe with his herald, feeding on the life energy of entire planets... Canuckistan!

And finally, "It was all a dream!"... Roadie!

Questions will be PMed in mere moments, and we'll begin Match Game Apocalypse on Thursday!

[Mateus]

Let's begin the first exciting, buttery round of Match Game Apocalypse!

***Officer Lockup sure is a stickler for rules. Yesterday, when a huge asteroid crashed into the city centre, he wrote it a ticket for (blank).***

Good Luck, and have your answers in by Monday!

[diddy]

Obstructing traffic!

[rangerdog]

Loitering. HA

[iskinner]

Exceeding the posted speed limit.

[Darth Credence]

Illegal parking.

[marrya]

DUI. With extra character

[Stan The Man]

Failure to yield.

[Chloe]

Vagrancy.

Occupy!