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  #1  
Old 20 March 2007, 06:55 PM
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Buckle Up Buckle Up is offline
 
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Vanishing The Stranger (Received in Email)

Just got this in email. I couldn't find it, but chow if necc.

Note...when I first started reading it, I thought it was talking about Bush.

The Stranger

A few years after I was born, my Dad met a stranger who was new to our small Texas town. From the beginning, Dad was fascinated with this enchanting newcomer and soon invited him to live with our family. The stranger was quickly accepted and was around from then on.

As I grew up, I never questioned his place in my family. In my young mind, he had a special niche. My parents were complementary instructors:


Mom taught me good from evil, and Dad taught me to obey. But the stranger...he was our storyteller. He would keep us spellbound for hours on end with adventures, mysteries and comedies.

If I wanted to know anything about politics, history or science, he always knew the answers about the past, understood the present and even seemed able to predict the future! He took my family to the first major league ball game. He made me laugh, and he made me cry. The stranger never stopped talking, but Dad didn't seem to mind.

Sometimes, Mom would get up quietly while the rest of us were shushing each other to listen to what he had to say, and she would go to the kitchen for peace and quiet. (I wonder now if she ever prayed for the stranger to leave.)

Dad ruled our household with certain moral convictions, but the stranger never felt obligated to honor them. Profanity, for example, was not allowed in our home... Not from us, our friends or any visitors. Our longtime visitor, however, got away with four-letter words that burned my ears and made my dad squirm and my mother blush.

My Dad didn't permit the liberal use of alcohol. But the stranger encouraged us to try it on a regular basis. He made cigarettes look cool, cigars manly and pipes distinguished. He talked freely (much too freely!) about sex. His comments were sometimes blatant, sometimes suggestive, and generally embarrassing.

I now know that my early concepts about relationships were influenced strongly by the stranger. Time after time, he opposed the values of my parents, yet he was seldom rebuked... And NEVER asked to leave.

More than fifty years have passed since the stranger moved in with our family. He has blended right in and is not nearly as fascinating as he was at first. Still, if you could walk into my parents' den today, you
would still find him sitting over in his corner, waiting for someone to listen to him talk and watch him draw his pictures. His name?....

We just call him, "TV."

* *Note: This should be required reading for every household in
America!**
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  #2  
Old 20 March 2007, 06:58 PM
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Artemis Artemis is offline
 
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So...the stranger was Billy Joel?

Actually, I was assuming it was going to be Jesus. (Don't ask why; I'm conditioned, I guess.)
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  #3  
Old 20 March 2007, 07:01 PM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Artemis View Post
Actually, I was assuming it was going to be Jesus. (Don't ask why; I'm conditioned, I guess.)
You and me both. I'm actually a little disappointed that it wasn't.
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  #4  
Old 20 March 2007, 07:03 PM
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After all, Jesus did promote the liberal use of alcohol, and did talk about sex, and who's to say he didn't enjoy a fine Cuban once in a while?
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  #5  
Old 20 March 2007, 08:08 PM
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Tantei Kid Tantei Kid is offline
 
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TV

Yes, 50 years ago the TV used four letter words and talked nonstop about sex. It's always the TV's fault.
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  #6  
Old 20 March 2007, 08:56 PM
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Lancastrian Lancastrian is offline
 
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I am way to young to have guessed "radio".
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  #7  
Old 20 March 2007, 09:09 PM
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See, now I was thinking it was going to be this guy, now I'm just bummed.

How long until it gets to be about the evil interweb?
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  #8  
Old 20 March 2007, 09:23 PM
o4o3o4
 
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I thought it was a bum they found in the streets. I don't think any tv will work for 50 years straight. It'd probably break.
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  #9  
Old 20 March 2007, 09:41 PM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by o4o3o4 View Post
I thought it was a bum they found in the streets. I don't think any tv will work for 50 years straight. It'd probably break.
We still have the first TV my grandfather ever bought. Everything's in black and white, but it gets reception fine.
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  #10  
Old 20 March 2007, 10:54 PM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Zamboni_Rodeo View Post
You and me both. I'm actually a little disappointed that it wasn't.
Isn't it amazing how often he pops up in these things? I was also thinking the same thing.


James
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  #11  
Old 20 March 2007, 11:11 PM
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queen of the caramels queen of the caramels is offline
 
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Elbe View Post
See, now I was thinking it was going to be this guy, now I'm just bummed.
Me too, oh yes I would find room for him anytime
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  #12  
Old 21 March 2007, 01:39 PM
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At least Daddy didn't bring home the guy from the Camus novel. Then four letter words would have been the least of the family's concerns.

Did Jesus really promote the liberal use of alcohol though? I mean, sure he turned water into wine but nothing in the Bible indicates he got plastered.
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  #13  
Old 21 March 2007, 02:25 PM
Tisiphone Tisiphone is offline
 
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I'm reading the Camus novel at the moment.

Quote:
* *Note: This should be required reading for every household in
America!**
Why?
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  #14  
Old 21 March 2007, 02:48 PM
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PatYoung PatYoung is offline
 
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Buckleupp View Post
He talked freely (much too freely!) about sex. His comments were sometimes blatant, sometimes suggestive, and generally embarrassing.
Unfortunately he was all talk and no action.
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  #15  
Old 21 March 2007, 03:44 PM
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Mateus Mateus is offline
 
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Reporter

A few years after I was born, my Dad met a stranger who was new to our small Texas town. From the beginning, Dad was fascinated with this enchanting newcomer and soon invited him to live with our family. The stranger was quickly accepted and was around from then on.

As I grew up, I never questioned his place in my family. In my young mind, he had a special niche. My parents were complementary instructors:


Mom taught me good from evil, and Dad taught me to obey. But the stranger...he was our conscience. He would simply stand behind us, and if we had a question about anything, he would simply nod or shake his head. Or he would be mysteriously silent on the subject, or ambiguous.

If I wanted to know anything about politics, history or the evils of science, he always knew the answers about the past, understood the present and even seemed able to predict the future! He took my family from the beginning of time to the end of the world. He made me laugh, and he made me cry. The stranger didn't always make sense, especially with our modern knowledge and sensibilities, but we didn't seem to notice.

Sometimes, Mom would get up quietly while the rest of us were shushing each other to listen to what he had to say, and she would go to the kitchen for peace and quiet. (I wonder now if she ever questioned the stranger's answers.)

Dad ruled our household with certain moral convictions, but the stranger never felt obligated to honor them. Incest, for example, was not allowed in our home... Not from us, our friends or any visitors. Our longtime visitor, however, got away with dad-on-daughter stories that burned my mind's eye and made my dad squirm and my mother blush.

My Dad didn't permit the use of alcohol. But the stranger encouraged and discouraged us from using it on a seemingly random basis. He made atrocities look cool, genocide manly and beards distinguished. He talked freely (much too freely!) about sex. His comments were sometimes blatant, sometimes suggestive, and generally embarrassing. Quite frankly, he seemed more obsessed with the notion of two people "doin' it" than anything else he discussed.

I now know that my early concepts about relationships were influenced strongly by the stranger. Time after time, he contradicted himself, yet he was seldom questioned... And NEVER asked to explain himself.

More than fifty years have passed since the stranger moved in with our family. He has blended right in and is not nearly as applicable as he was at first. Still, if you could walk into my parents' den today, you
would still find him sitting over in his corner, waiting for someone to listen to him talk and watch him arbitrarily deal devastation for the smallest infractions. His name?....

We just call him, "God."
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  #16  
Old 21 March 2007, 04:24 PM
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PatYoung PatYoung is offline
 
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The Stranger

A few years after I was born, my Dad met a stranger who was new to our small Texas town. From the beginning, Dad was fascinated with this enchanting newcomer and soon invited him to live with our family. The stranger was quickly accepted and was around from then on.

As I grew up, I never questioned his place in my family. In my young mind, he had a special niche. My parents were complementary instructors:


Mom taught me good from evil, and Dad taught me to obey. But the stranger...he was our decider. He exploited our parents simple moral teachings and made us believe that tax cuts for the wealthy were ordained by God.

If I wanted to know anything about politics, history or science, he always knew the answers about the past, understood the present and even seemed able to predict the future! He took my family to the first major league ball game see a miserable team he himself had assembled. He made me laugh, and he made me cry. The stranger never stopped talking, but Dad didn't seem to mind. As Dad said, "He's the kind of a man you can have a hamburger with".

Sometimes, Mom would get up quietly while the rest of us were shushing each other to listen to what he had to say, and she would go to the kitchen for peace and quiet. (I wonder now if she ever prayed for the stranger to leave.) She knew that while he was shooting his mouth off condemning drugs and premarital sex that he himself had a checkered past. That woman could not abide a hypocrite.

Dad ruled our household with certain moral convictions, but the stranger never felt obligated to honor them. Lying, for example, was not allowed in our home... Not from us, our friends or any visitors. Our longtime visitor, however, got away with entire speeches that burned my ears and made my dad squirm and my mother blush.

My Dad didn't permit the liberal use of alcohol. But the stranger would sneak a guzzle when no one was looking. He made invading countries look cool, manly and distinguished. But if anyone got hurt, he was the last to visit them or care for them. His comments about war and foreign policy were generally embarrassing. to anyone outside Texas.

More than six years have passed since the stranger moved in with our family. He has blended right in and is not nearly as fascinating as he was at first. Still, if you could walk into my parents' den today, you
would still find him sitting over in his corner, waiting for someone to listen to him talk and watch him draw his pictures, even though we now know he is a lying moron. His name?....

We just call him, "W"
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  #17  
Old 16 April 2007, 02:33 PM
JMcCaf
 
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PatYoung, YOMANK

That was the most creative anti-Bush thing I've seen in a while.
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  #18  
Old 18 April 2007, 08:29 AM
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Rachael Rachael is offline
 
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Wow, I must be the only one who thought it was going to be "sin" or "Satan"...
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