Appropriate gift for a friend who lost his father

[Mateus]

A few days ago, my friend lost his father to cancer (and the mayonnaise jar wealthcare system in America ), and I want to get him something more than just a greeting card. I was thinking a photo album of some kind, but my wife thinks that I should only do that if I have pictures of his father (which I don't). Any suggestions?

[bthyb]

Donation to a charity relevant to him or his father?

[Aud 1]

A casserole for his freezer. A gift certificate to a good local place that delivers. No one wants to cook and can easily forget about calories.

[Jenn]

Originally Posted by Aud 1

A casserole for his freezer.

With instructions for heating affixed.

If he has kids, offer to babysit. If he has a dog, offer to walk it. Maybe pick up a bag of groceries of some easy-to-make or ready-to-eat things. Offer to help him with any of the mundane errands or chores that unfortunately aren't going to go away if he ignores them hard enough. Try to do something that will give him a little more time.

When my mother died, the thing I needed most was fewer things on the To Do list. I was the executrix and had to handle all of the estate and property stuff. By the time I was done dealing with all of that each day, the dishes in the sink and the laundry pile and my empty stomach were all impossibly overwhelming and tremendously unfair.

With the exception of one flower delivery and one stuffed toy, I don't remember a single card or gift I got. I do remember (and am still grateful to) the people who sacrificed a just little of their time to take a little bit of the weight off my shoulders.

[Auntie Witch]

FWIW, I agree with your wife. I had someone give me a lovely (blank) scrapbook after Mom died. I still haven't had time to fill it with pictures.

Now had they filled it beforehand, it would have been priceless.

[franjava]

These are all great ideas. Maybe a donation to the American Cancer Society in his honor. Food can be tricky due to special diets/tastes, unless you know your friend's likes really well. After my miscarriage, I got a lot of food that I thought was disgusting and I felt horrible throwing out these gifts that were given with such love! Doing chores (lawn mowing, baby/dog sitting) is a good idea too.