Polish toughness contests...

These are supposdely drinking competitions that frequently result in the loss of limbs....

I'm especially interested to learn if this story could be true:

"Toughness contests are a traditional part of Polish recreational life," Regional Prosecutor Stefan Wojcelski told a court in Stargard Szczeciski, "and the state has no wish to interfere with a playful tradition. But, while we accept amputation as an inevitable part of this we do not accept murder, and I therefore ask for the heaviest penalites to be broiguth against the three accused.

Wojcelski, who was leading the prosecution of three men accused of manslaughter, explained what had happened. "The three men had been drinking solidly all afternoon in the garden of Krzysztofy Azninski, the dead man. They put on traditional toughness bonnets and began a contest. At first they played breath holding contests. Then they hit each other with blocks of wood and banged nails into their own flesh. But then Franciszek Zyzcoszusko put his hand on a chopping block, and dared Krzysztof A to cut it off. Krzysztof A hacked at it with ihis own knife partially severing the wrist then pout his own head on the block and challenged Franciszek Z to chop it off. Franciszek Z beheaded him with an axe. The three (remaining) men decided things had gone too far, stopped the contest, and began singing a folksong "Roll the head of the giant" which woke the neighbours. Thats when they were observed burying the body in the garden."

The three accused pleaded not guilty on grounds of drunkeness.

(PAP [Polish News Agency], 25/10/94, spotter P Masters; printed in Private Eye [print date unkown])

[Troberg]

Well, as long as it's all in good fun.

Or something...

[Richard W]

"Traditional toughness bonnets"?

Private Eye's Funny Old World column isn't the most reliable source even though it gives supposed attributions for everything. The cites are rarely from sources that you can confirm. There was a period a few years ago when a lot of the items were taken more-or-less directly from forwarded emails and attributed to obscure local newspapers in the USA and South East Asia and so on... it's improved since then, but you still have no idea of the context of the report or the reliability of the sources they give, even if they are based on items in real newspapers. They could be taken from the "Completely made up news" column for all we know.

I've read similar stories before, so I don't doubt that it did appear in Private Eye, (I think I read it at the time - although that seems to have been rewritten slightly over their usual style; the names don't look right for example) but even in the event that there's a true incident at the core, then it's extremely exaggerated and embellished, I'd say.

Thanks Richard...

I'm sad to say I think I agree with you. I wish it were true...

However, if anyone can confirm any of the details about toughness competitions, hats, the song about the giant I'd be really grateful..

[Dara bhur gCara]

I've never understood why Funny Old World, uniquely among Private Eye columns, is attributed, nor do I understand really why Victor Lewis-Smith is given any real credit for it at all, since it's just a case of choosing the funniest reader submissions every fortnight, and could probably be done by a trained monkey.

Perhaps this puzzlement is just because I dislike VLS so, but it's always bothered me.

[SatansHobbit]

It's all fun and games until someone loses a head.

The OP is rather like this Darwin Award story from 1996, (Not that the Darwin awards are reliable sources.)

The quote at the end,

Krzysztof Mach says, "This story is not entirely true. I am Polish and I remember reading about this incident in newspapers. Two guys got drunk and started to make macho type bets. You overestimate the wealth of polish peasants if you believe they were using a chain saw. I remember the bet was resolved using an axe. One man laid his head down and bet the one with an axe that he was not be brave enough to make the cut."

suggests that there may be a germ of truth in it though.

[Jay Temple]

Originally Posted by SatansHobbit

It's all fun and games until someone loses a head.

May I use this as a sig line?

[Richard W]

Here's somebody from alt.folklore.urban asking about the same email in 2003:

Poles, swedes, chainsaw? half way down.

Google is too efficient - if you search for "Polish toughness" now, the first hit is this thread!

(edit) Here's a "Polish drinking game". Guessing the number? Wimps - there's no mutilation involved at all!

[Valitudinarius Rex]

Originally Posted by SamJ

These are supposdely drinking competitions that frequently result in the loss of limbs....Franciszek Z beheaded him with an axe. The three (remaining) men decided things had gone too far, stopped the contest, and began singing a folksong "Roll the head of the giant" which woke the neighbours. Thats when they were observed burying the body in the garden.The three accused pleaded not guilty on grounds of drunkeness.

(PAP [Polish News Agency], 25/10/94, spotter P Masters; printed in Private Eye [print date unkown])

This reminds me of the Worker's Compensation joke of which the punch line is
"Well, when you put his (severed) head in the plastic bag, he suffocated...."

An Alaskan, Floridan, and a Texan are around a campfire one night at a Dude Ranch. The Alskan says, "This Morning, when I woke up, there was a rattlesnake in my tent. I grabbed it up with my bare hands, snapped off it's head, skinned it, and ate it for breakfast."
The Floridan says, "Oh yea, yesterday, while I was watching a guy rope cattle, a bull charged at me. When it got to me, I side stepped, jumped on it's back, restled it to the ground, and broke it's neck with my bare hands."
The Texan just stood there, quietly stirring the coles with his penis...

[Deepfrydegg]

Originally Posted by wild1

An Alaskan, Floridan, and a Texan are around a campfire one night at a Dude Ranch. The Alskan says, "This Morning, when I woke up, there was a rattlesnake in my tent. I grabbed it up with my bare hands, snapped off it's head, skinned it, and ate it for breakfast."
The Floridan says, "Oh yea, yesterday, while I was watching a guy rope cattle, a bull charged at me. When it got to me, I side stepped, jumped on it's back, restled it to the ground, and broke it's neck with my bare hands."
The Texan just stood there, quietly stirring the coles with his penis...

Similar:
Three mice are sitting around drinking talking about how tough each is. One mouse says, "I lay on my back and trigger the mouse trap on purpose. Then I catch the bar and bench press it for twenty reps. When I am done I take the cheese for a snack."
Second one says, "So, I find the rat poison and eat it. Just cause it gives me a bit of a rush!"
Third one stands up to go and says, "You guys sure are tough. I got nothing. I am going home to F**k the cat."