David Lettermen on Filipinos

[snopes]

Comment: The message below is being circulated within Filipino and
Filipino-American circles via email:


Subject: David Lettermen on Filipinos

I don't know if you've heard or watched David
Letterman's Show when he used Filipino-
American for his top ten reasons, but
this certainly shows we are an emerging
group in this diverse society to be
featured in Dave's famous TV show..

Happy reading to all!!!

Top 10 Reasons Why There Couldn't Be a
Filipino-American US President,
By David Letterman

10. The White House is not big enough
for in-laws and extended relatives.

9. There are not enough parking spaces
at the White House for 2 Honda Civics,
2 Toyota Land Cruisers, 3 Toyota
Corollas, a Mercedes Benz, a BMW , and
an MPV (My Pinoy Van).

8. Dignitaries generally are
intimidated by eating with their
fingers at State dinners.

7. There are too many dining rooms in
the White House - where will they put
the picture of the Last Supper?

6. The White House walls are not big
enough to hold a pair of giant wooden
spoon and fork

5. Secret Service staff won't respond
to 'psst... psst' or hoy.hoyhoy

4. Secret Service staff will not be
comfortable driving the presidential
car with a Holy Rosary hanging on the
rear view mirror, or the statue of the
Santo Nino on the dashboard.

3. No budget allocation to purchase a
Karaoke music-machine for every room
in the White House.

2. State dinners do not allow 'Take
Home'.

AND THE NUMBER 1 REASON WHY THERE
COULDN'T BE A FILIPINO-AMERICAN U.S.
PRESIDENT IS...

1. Air Force One does not allow
overweight Balikbayan boxes!

[A Turtle Named Mack]

I vote fake, if only because not enough Americans know any Filipinos to relate to these stereotypes. Heck, I do know several Filipinos and I don't 'get' most of these. I'm fairly sure this is Filipino self-mocking being attributed to Letterman.

[surfcitydogdad]

Turtle is right; these are cute, but no way was it on Letterman.

I'll bet this "top ten" list has really made the rounds in the Pinoy community in California!

I don't know what a Balikbayan is, but the rest are pretty generic for a lot of groups, with a few little adjustments.

I'd like to see the Mexican and Jewish versions, etc.

for Mormons: not enough bedrooms in the White House for the kids

[threehead_99]

Originally Posted by surfcitydogdad

for Mormons: not enough bedrooms in the White House for the kids

Does that mean all the wives share a very large bed with the CiC?

[Sweeney_Todd]

I vote false too. i doubt most Americans even know much about the Philippines or Filipinos. I am even willing to bet the most Americans even think they speak "Phillipine" in the Philippines.

[GoMeZu]

Originally Posted by Sweeney_Todd

I vote false too. i doubt most Americans even know much about the Philippines or Filipinos. I am even willing to bet the most Americans even think they speak "Phillipine" in the Philippines.

Hah! I know it's Tagalog! I think.... That's all I had to add to this thread, lol. I was just proud of myself for knowing.

[Sweeney_Todd]

I said most, not all.

[Stan The Man]

Originally Posted by Sweeney_Todd

I said most, not all.

I knew tagalog also. Americans are 2 for 2! Woohoo!

[E. Q. Taft]

I know they speak Tagalog, though for a long time I assumed they spoke Spanish. (I imagine there are a relatively large number of Spanish-speakers there, as it was a Spanish colony before we stole it from 'em.) (Then of course the Japanese took it from us, but we got it back for a while...)

But, yes, I agree, most of those jokes are too obscure for most people without a close knowledge of Filipino-Americans to even remotely get.

What I hope we don't see, six or eighteen months down the road, is the same list being circulated by some group outraged at the stereotyping and demanding an apology from Letterman...

[Sweeney_Todd]

Most have Spanish surnames but few know much Spanish other than names of food. English is spoken by most people. I did not realize that you had stolen the Philippines? When did you do that?

Originally Posted by Sweeney_Todd

I did not realize that you had stolen the Philippines? When did you do that?

In 1898. During the Spanish-American War. Which was over Cuba. When someone blew up the battleship Maine off the Cuban coast. So the first battle of the war was near the Philippines.

Go figure the sense of war.

Pogue

[E. Q. Taft]

The Spanish-American War being one of those odd bits of history that an American can't help having mixed feelings about. On the one hand, it was pretty much an imperialistic grab for power; the conflict with Spain was totally trumped up, and while nobody knows to this day who blew up the Maine, it most likely was not the Spanish. So I can't help but be a bit embarrassed about the whole conflict (along with the war with Mexico, which was even more blatantly about our own expansion).

On the other hand, it is the war that vaulted the US into its status as one of the Great Powers, based on our incredibly lopsided naval battles with Spain; our navy was just much more modern and blew theirs out of the water. This, incidentally, set the stage for the first World War in a way: Germany, observing the war, began to build its own modern navy; combined with its army, this made it an incredibly potent threat to the supremacy of Great Britain. The British, who up till that time had always had somewhat uneasy relations with the US, suddenly realized that it would be suicide to let the US and Germany combine against it, and so the "special relationship" was born, whereby the US and Britain became incredibly staunch allies and have remained so ever since.

However, although the war started over Cuba, the War Hawks in Congress made a promise not to annex Cuba if the war went well, to somewhat quiet those who objected to the war. They later regretted this promise immensely; but we did annex the Phillippines. (This led to a guerrilla conflict in that country, with nationalist resisters fighting the US occupiers, a war that wound up costing far more than the Spanish-American war, but is little mentioned in the history books; perhaps if it were more widely studied, we would have avoided a lot of the same mistakes in places like Viet Nam. This war, incidentally, was ended largely through the efforts of William Howard Taft, who became governor of the Phillippines and actually treated the natives like they were people, which succeeded where military strength had failed. Taft may not have been much of a President, but you can't discount his contributions to the country over-all.)

[Dondi]

I gotta raise the BS flag here as well. In a day and age where sensitivities to nationalities requires a great deal of political correctness, I doubt very much that David Letterman would have used the above "Top Ten" list. Certainly, not in recent years. Besides, the Top Ten list generally reflect currrent trends and topics. When was the last time the Philippines really became major news enough to spark a national consciousness of it?

And finally, as a husband of a Filipina, there are too many obscure references on the list for the general public to appreaciate the humor of it. No one is going to know that a balikbayan box is basically used as a large care package delivered through Filipino-based shipping companies from Filipino in the states to ship goods to their relatives in the Philippines. Nor would I think the general public would know that Karaoke is a favorite pasttime in the Philippines or the reference to hang religion items from rearview mirrors and dashboards as a reference to Jeepneys.

[Sweeney_Todd]

wikipedia states that the National Geographic expedition in 1999 on the sinking of the Maine states “it appears more probable than was previously concluded that a mine caused the inward bent bottom structure and the detonation of the magazines.” not sure if this points the finger at the Spanish or not.

[ThistleS]

Can someone explain the meaning of "hoy hoy?" There are several elderly Filipinos in my life and a bunch of people who say "hoy" all the time but in characteristic Filipino fashion they just shrug when I ask what it means. Is it an interjection?

[ganzfeld]

About the Maine and the Spanish-American War, we all know that the Maine was used as propaganda for the war but did it really have anything to do with the outbreak of hostilities? It wasn't mentioned in the declaration of war, unlike, for example, the US declaration of war on Japan. The date that the war is declared to have begun also has nothing to do with the sinking. It's my impression that it really matters little how or why it was sunk because it was never even the nominal reason for the war starting. (The idea that it was sunk by either the Spanish or the US in order to start hostilities seems preposterous to me. Maybe some other party but even that seems unlikely.)

[Artemis]

What was up with the gigantic fork/spoon reference?

[surfcitydogdad]

Originally Posted by Artemis

What was up with the gigantic fork/spoon reference?

Giant wooden ones, about 18" long. That would be a popular wall decoration - call it folk art or kitch. Bought as souvenirs or rec'd as gifts, imported from who-knows-where (the Philipines, or nations to its south?).

Did you ever see the episode of Everybody Loves Raymond, in which his mother finally takes down such a spoon and fork from the kitchen wall, as she's never liked it anyway, but when she does, the wallpaper under them is much lighter than the rest of the wall, so she hangs them back up in resignation. They were supposed to be Italian Americans, rather than Filipino Americans, but I suspect there is no strong ethnic boundary for kitch.

As I mentioned in an early post, most of the list could be made appliciable to many other groups with only a slight tweek. I've seen, due to my work with Census 2000, my church, or visiting friends of friends, or now, my new in-laws, the homes of many lower to middle-class Latin American immigrants, and I could make a list of common items of decor.

As a middle class, college-educated Anglo, my walls and shelves are going to have Farside calendars, wolf calendars, and Native American, Southwest art items, and a few vintage items from my grandparents, parents, and my youth (my Gunsmoke lunchbox, one of my grandfather's wooden grocery boxes). Every group, sub-group (and individual) has its quirks.

Also, other Catholics, besides Filipinos, are going to have those Last Supper wall hangings!

[Elkhound]

Re the Spanish American War:

O dewey was the morning, all on the first of May.
And Dewey was the Admiral down in Manila Bay.
And dewey were the Spaniards eyes, that were all black and blue.
And do we feel discouraged? I do not think we do.

[Four Kitties]

Originally Posted by E. Q. Taft

What I hope we don't see, six or eighteen months down the road, is the same list being circulated by some group outraged at the stereotyping and demanding an apology from Letterman...

It's already been circulating for at least a year; there is indeed a version which condemns Letterman for his purported racism.

No, it was never on Letterman. It's not topical and/or funny enough for his audience, and it's not in the Top 10 archive. The tinfoil hats, of course, believe it was removed from the archive after their protests to the network.

Four Kitties