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  #1201  
Old 21 July 2017, 01:33 AM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Seaboe Muffinchucker View Post
Why not just find a convenient tree? Oh, oops. Oklahoma. You don't have too many of those.
I'm also a girl, so I'm ill-equipped for the ol' Pee on a Tree strategy.
  #1202  
Old 21 July 2017, 01:59 AM
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Haven't you ever seen The Color Purple?
  #1203  
Old 21 July 2017, 12:46 PM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Mouse View Post
I'm also a girl, so I'm ill-equipped for the ol' Pee on a Tree strategy.
I am female, and I have peed behind plenty of trees. One doesn't need to pee on the tree; the ground behind it will do.

I have also used the behind-the-car-door strategy, in areas with a lack of trees. Works better with four-door cars than with those that have only one on each side.

If I were urgent enough that I couldn't wait for a rest stop, I'd be too urgent to drive around back roads hunting for a public john. Or did you mean that you already knew where one was?
  #1204  
Old 21 July 2017, 02:21 PM
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Balance is very important for females with the pee near the tree thing (although it really was mostly a joke about Oklahoma and trees). If you do not have reliable balance when squatting, it's not a reasonable alternative. If there is a real, live tree, you can generally use that for balance.

LTTAM: the alarm on my new watch is much quieter than the one on my old watch, and I keep sleeping through it. Not disastrously, so far, but still.

Seaboe
  #1205  
Old 21 July 2017, 02:57 PM
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People who jaywalk on a busy street just a few steps away from an intersection.
  #1206  
Old 21 July 2017, 03:41 PM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Seaboe Muffinchucker View Post
Balance is very important for females with the pee near the tree thing (although it really was mostly a joke about Oklahoma and trees). If you do not have reliable balance when squatting, it's not a reasonable alternative. If there is a real, live tree, you can generally use that for balance.
To add- holding your back against the tree while in a sitting position is helpful for keeping the pee from going on your pants.
  #1207  
Old 21 July 2017, 05:49 PM
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Originally Posted by Beachlife! View Post
People who jaywalk on a busy street just a few steps away from an intersection.
Ditto on that!
  #1208  
Old 21 July 2017, 06:04 PM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by mbravo View Post
To add- holding your back against the tree while in a sitting position is helpful for keeping the pee from going on your pants.
If you don't need both hands for balance, one can be used to hold pants and underwear out of the way.

I agree that the entire operation is easier for people who can squat reasonably comfortably, whether the issue is balance, the state of one's knees, or something else; and that it may be impossible for some. But just being female doesn't prevent anybody from urinating outdoors, even presuming modern first world clothing.
  #1209  
Old 21 July 2017, 11:23 PM
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Originally Posted by Beachlife! View Post
I too have smelled skunk. Are there parts of North America where skunks don't live? Maybe the desert?
There are no skunks, raccoons or porcupines in my part of northern Alberta. Apparently there was a rabies epidemic many years ago and they have never recovered.
  #1210  
Old 22 July 2017, 02:17 AM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by thorny locust View Post
I am female, and I have peed behind plenty of trees. One doesn't need to pee on the tree; the ground behind it will do.

I have also used the behind-the-car-door strategy, in areas with a lack of trees. Works better with four-door cars than with those that have only one on each side.

If I were urgent enough that I couldn't wait for a rest stop, I'd be too urgent to drive around back roads hunting for a public john. Or did you mean that you already knew where one was?
I didn't trust my ability to do so without coming home smelling of urine. So I had my GPS show me to the nearest gas station. :sighs: I knew I'm lived in the middle of BumNFBSK, Nowhere USA, but I was seriously expecting to hear banjo music at some point.
  #1211  
Old 22 July 2017, 02:36 AM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Mouse View Post
I had my GPS show me to the nearest gas station.
Ah.

I appear to have been driving around, not only on the back roads, but in the previous century. I didn't think of that.


Quote:
Originally Posted by Mouse View Post
I knew I'm lived in the middle of BumNFBSK, Nowhere USA
There is no such thing as a place that's in the middle of nowhere.

Every place is the center of the universe. Not your universe, perhaps. But somebody's.
  #1212  
Old 22 July 2017, 05:09 PM
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LTTAM: I got some broccoli seedlings from a friend, and left them by my front door overnight so I could plant them this morning. By the time I went out there, my son had let the chickens out and they the leaves off all the seedlings.
  #1213  
Old 22 July 2017, 11:26 PM
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Crazy thought upon revisiting the skunk weed discussion: come to think of it, I've never been sprayed by a skunk, nor have I witnessed a spraying in action. I've seen a dead skunk in the middle of the road (stinkin' to hiiiiiigh heaven), and I already knew how to identify the smell then, so presumably at some point in my life, I encountered that odor and someone told me it was skunk.

But what if it wasn't? What if every time I've been in the woods thinking "eeew, a skunk was here," it was really just some dang hippies just out of sight smoking that dank skunk weed?

If anyone would like to send me some skunk weed to test this hypothesis (and see how many more I can come up with) I'm open to that.
  #1214  
Old 22 July 2017, 11:34 PM
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That's an interesting point. I've smelled skunk and I've seen skunk, but I've never smelled a skunk that I also saw. I've also detected a skunk like odor from non-skunk road-kill. Maybe what I call skunk smell, isn't.
  #1215  
Old 22 July 2017, 11:42 PM
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Thanks for the earworm, Esprise Me...I think.
  #1216  
Old 23 July 2017, 01:22 AM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by smittykins View Post
Thanks for the earworm, Esprise Me...I think.
I hit reply to say the exact same thing, but saw that you beat me to the punch.

I've had dogs sprayed by skunks, and I've seen many. I've never been sprayed, but I know the skunk smell well.

The skunky beer smell (and the skunky marijuana smell) are no where near as intense as the real skunk smell. They are similar, but not quite the same.

I would draw a parallel between them as the difference between tasting real watermelon and tasting watermelon candy. They are similar in some small ways, but by no means the same.

In fact, it was only after I tasted skunky beer and was told that was what it was that I could associate it with a skunk. Before I was told, I just thought it tasted bad.
  #1217  
Old 23 July 2017, 04:58 PM
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This is a TYSHTTP, a TISHTTM, and LTTAM all in one.... so I figure here is best-

TYSHTTP: If I've just bought something from you, please don't place the receipt on the thing I bought and start writing on it in pen so that whatever you are jotting down gets engraved on the thing I'm buying. If I was buying it for myself I wouldn't care as much, but it's a gift and I'd rather it not have a random website scraped into it Also, just because I asked for no bag doesn't mean I didn't want my change, even if it was less than a dollar.

TISHTTM: You are allowed to tell the above person to stop writing on your gift; you are allowed to ask for your change. The salesperson is not going to get huffy with you or think you are pulling a shortchange scam. Now you left the store feeling awful because someone else was not particularly mindful and you were too much of a wimpy baby to speak up about it. Be your own advocate. You tell your kids this all the time.

It's only a LTTAM because: When I got home I could see that the writing only got on the plastic wrapping and didn't make it all the way to the object itself. The wrapping looks messy now from where I tried to smooth it but the gift recipient will not notice. At least there was a plastic wrapper and she wasn't just writing against the smooth surface itself.
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