snopes.com  

Go Back   snopes.com > SLC Central > Rantidote

Reply
 
Thread Tools Display Modes
  #21  
Old 25 January 2017, 05:03 AM
ganzfeld's Avatar
ganzfeld ganzfeld is offline
 
Join Date: 05 September 2005
Location: Kyoto, Japan
Posts: 23,011
Japan

I'm sure I'll still be here next time you come!
Reply With Quote
  #22  
Old 25 January 2017, 03:10 PM
thorny locust's Avatar
thorny locust thorny locust is offline
 
Join Date: 27 April 2007
Location: Upstate NY
Posts: 7,856
Default

Quote:
Originally Posted by ASL View Post
trying to draw on my experiences and use something Tim O'Brien called "story truth" in his novel The Things They Carried. The idea behind “story truth” is that mere facts may be inadequate to convey Truth. That sometimes you need lies (or rather fiction) to get the Truth across, even if you’re ostensibly relating something autobiographical.
You might also be interested in reading Ursula LeGuin on the subject -- I don't have the exact references handy, but in some of her essays about the nature of writing fiction she talks about telling truth by telling lies.

Quote:
Originally Posted by ASL View Post
There's no good reason to feel "guilty" about something that happened that I couldn’t possibly have stopped, right?
There's no good logical reason; but there must be emotional reasons, because it's very common for people to feel guilty about something having happened that they couldn't logically have stopped.

Writing it may be a good way of dealing with it.

Quote:
Originally Posted by ASL View Post
But things are looking up. After about a month and a half of, finally, not going out to sea and constantly operating I think I'm starting to settle back into somewhat of a normal routine (as in I can go buy a week’s worth of food every week without being gone for a month in the middle and being to burnt out to go out for anything but fast food before running out of food when I'm back again). I can actually spare some time to concentrate/focus on writing (on top of all the very dull, boring, highly technical BS I have to write for my job).[ . . . ]
Perhaps it's all part of getting better, coming to understand why I feel how I feel about this. I couldn’t even parse these feelings before.
This reads to me like you're succeeding in the process of healing from damage. For what it's worth, I'd like to send encouraging noises for further healing. And I'd be interested in reading what you write, when you feel you've got something ready to be seen by others.
Reply With Quote
  #23  
Old 02 May 2017, 08:53 PM
ASL's Avatar
ASL ASL is offline
 
Join Date: 04 July 2003
Location: Norfolk, VA
Posts: 5,214
Devil

I think I figured this out just today, for the first time ever: I think I made it to where I am by making a deal with the devil.

Not literally, of course (I'm not crazy, after all), but in the sense that five or six years ago I recognized I had some issues that probably should have been dealt with at the earliest opportunity, but I made a conscious decision not to because I knew it would end my career to take the time to do so (dealing with a broken leg would have had the same effect: it would have thrown my career timing off and prevented me from being promoted). I made a personal decision to ignore/suppress those issues (because, unlike a broken leg, this is the kind of issue that you can hide for a while before anyone catches on) and to just "deal with it" in the hopes that on the back end it would all just go away. Though I earned the promotion I sought, the issues are still there and I feel like I'm struggling to stay afloat. I figure if I can tread water another year without bringing anyone else down with me, I should be fine: I'll be out of the Navy by then.

There's a line in a song that goes "I couldn't tell them what I'd been through or they'd lock me up forever." I don't think it's so much what I've been through as how I would describe it that would concern people.

If anyone is concerned: yes, I am seeing a psychiatrist and no, I'm not going to harm myself or others. What really sucks, though, is that social convention would tend to preclude me from having a frank and honest conversation with anyone about... anything. But especially this.

The devil is within me. And, again, I don't actually think the devil is within me. This is a metaphor, people. I'm not schizophrenic (but if I were it would be a perfectly legitimate medical condition not worthy of ridicule).
Reply With Quote
  #24  
Old 02 May 2017, 11:12 PM
thorny locust's Avatar
thorny locust thorny locust is offline
 
Join Date: 27 April 2007
Location: Upstate NY
Posts: 7,856
Default

Quote:
Originally Posted by ASL View Post
If anyone is concerned
Yes, we certainly are (I'm sure I'm not just speaking for myself.)

Whatever it is you can't talk about: -- I haven't time to phrase this right, I'm late for a meeting -- will try to say more later.
Reply With Quote
  #25  
Old 03 May 2017, 03:22 AM
Dr. Dave Dr. Dave is offline
 
Join Date: 28 June 2005
Location: Montgomery County, MD
Posts: 5,221
Default

Quote:
Originally Posted by ASL View Post
If anyone is concerned
Yes

Quote:
I'm not schizophrenic (but if I were it would be a perfectly legitimate medical condition not worthy of ridicule).
Many mental health conditions are legitimate and not worthy of ridicule. It's no guarantee someone will not ridicule, but whatever you are dealing with- and I am glad to hear you are getting some help- it is legitimate and it is not worthy of ridicule.
Reply With Quote
  #26  
Old 03 May 2017, 04:08 AM
thorny locust's Avatar
thorny locust thorny locust is offline
 
Join Date: 27 April 2007
Location: Upstate NY
Posts: 7,856
Default

Quote:
Originally Posted by ASL View Post
What really sucks, though, is that social convention would tend to preclude me from having a frank and honest conversation with anyone about... anything. But especially this.
Okay, it's possible this isn't applicable. But I'm gonna post it anyway.

http://www.viruscomix.com/peoplewatc...le-watching-2/
Reply With Quote
  #27  
Old 03 May 2017, 10:09 AM
ASL's Avatar
ASL ASL is offline
 
Join Date: 04 July 2003
Location: Norfolk, VA
Posts: 5,214
Default

The situation at present is that I thought in 1 month my relief, the person who will do my job when I leave, would be on board. And I was supposed to have at most 4 more months in my current position, after which I could move into a position requiring... less influence over other people's lives. I decided to finally seek treatments or longstanding issues (that have been particularly problematic since I've made the decision to leave the Navy) a couple months ago based on that timeline, the idea that it was almost over.

It turns out if I submit my resignation from my current position, they will keep me in this job until I separate from naval service in May of 2018. They will send my relief somewhere else. This presents me with a moral dilemma that is difficult to describe typing from an iPhone, so I'll just have to leave it at that for now.

What it comes down to, though, is that as the devil will tend to do, it's back to collect and unsurprisingly for a deal with the devil, the cost on the back end of the deal may be worse than if I had said "no thanks" and walked away five years ago.
Reply With Quote
  #28  
Old 03 May 2017, 10:47 AM
ganzfeld's Avatar
ganzfeld ganzfeld is offline
 
Join Date: 05 September 2005
Location: Kyoto, Japan
Posts: 23,011
Default

Concerned but less so that you're talking about it here. So don't worry -- we're not mounting a snopeservention... yet
Reply With Quote
  #29  
Old 03 May 2017, 11:31 AM
DawnStorm's Avatar
DawnStorm DawnStorm is offline
 
Join Date: 11 March 2003
Location: Montgomery County, MD
Posts: 15,367
Icon105

One of the hardest--and bravest--things anyone can do is to say to themselves I need help! It involves a major swallowing of pride, an admittance that you're not perfect, and then having to deal with the problem in a more open fashion. By open, I mean seeking help/letting close friends and loved ones know what the heck is going on. Sadly, there is no cure for problems such as this, but a skilled professional will show you how to keep the personal demons at bay. Good luck, and know that many people are the same road you are.
Reply With Quote
  #30  
Old 03 May 2017, 11:57 AM
UEL's Avatar
UEL UEL is offline
 
Join Date: 01 August 2004
Location: Ottawa/Fredericton, Canada
Posts: 8,644
Baseball

ASL, I am firmly in your corner.
Reply With Quote
  #31  
Old 03 May 2017, 02:14 PM
Alarm's Avatar
Alarm Alarm is offline
 
Join Date: 26 May 2011
Location: Nepean, ON
Posts: 5,086
Default

ASL,

Taking care of mental issues seems like it is always a damned if you do, damned if you don't proposition, but it shouldn't be. Take care of yourself first, you're the only you you'll have!
Reply With Quote
  #32  
Old 03 May 2017, 03:58 PM
Dr. Dave Dr. Dave is offline
 
Join Date: 28 June 2005
Location: Montgomery County, MD
Posts: 5,221
Default

Quote:
Originally Posted by ASL View Post

It turns out if I submit my resignation from my current position, they will keep me in this job until I separate from naval service in May of 2018. They will send my relief somewhere else. This presents me with a moral dilemma that is difficult to describe typing from an iPhone, so I'll just have to leave it at that for now.
Thank you for sharing. Just to help walk this through- if you do not want to do that, please ignore and accept my apology for overstepping!

If I understand this correctly:
1. Under the usual course of things, you would be rotated out of your current position to a different position.
2. Someone (obviously) would be rotated into your current position.
3. You plan to leave the Navy in approximately 12 months.
4. If you tell them now of your plans in 3, the Navy will instead of doing 1 will just have you finish out the next 12 months in the current position.
5. You really want, need in fact, to get out of the current position and not spend the next 12 months in it.

Yes?

I'm guessing that the moral dilemma you see is something like:

If I don't tell them I'm leaving until I get to the next post, then I am taking the next post knowing I will only stay for 8 months or so.

Yes?

Questions- because I really do not know how this works:
1. In May 2018, is that the end of a period of enlistment? A point where you need to be re-upped or out?
2. Is there a customary or required length of time one gives before informing the Navy of the decision to separate or not re-enlist?
3. What is the typical length of time an officer of your rank stays in a given posting?

Advice:
I admire your wanting to "do the right thing," but I am not sure that it is clear that there is one right thing anyway. More importantly, it sounds like you need to change to ensure your own well-being. The normal course of events would take you out of this post to one that you believe would be less stressful or a better fit for whatever reason. I do not see any obligation to share future plans in advance that would cause the Navy to change their plans for you. More to the point, if staying in this post will worsen your issues, it is not good for you or for your colleagues. So there is more reason to do what you can to change the situation, and certainly not to do something that would cause you to stay in this post longer.

As for the Devil coming to collect, it is very common and very understandable that you feel that way, and also very admirable that you want to honor your obligations. But you are not dishonoring them by taking your next assignment as it comes.

My advice here is WAY easier said than done, and probably sounds trite form some guy, a civilian no less, on the internet, but here it is: Deal with the cards in front of you. You have to ensure your own well-being. There is no option to go back and woulda' coulda' shoulda'. So here you are, and you do have to deal with that, but that does not mean making things harder on yourself either. You are not proposing deserting, just taking your next assignment as it comes. There is nothing wrong with that, and you do not owe the Devil, the Navy, or anyone else anything more than you have done- you took your assignments as they came and did your best to serve them through the agreed time.

TL;DR: Take care of yourself and I wish you the best. I hope this group provides the paradox of being "friends" but in reality being anonymous enough that you feel you can share even just to process your own thoughts.
Reply With Quote
  #33  
Old 03 May 2017, 09:46 PM
ASL's Avatar
ASL ASL is offline
 
Join Date: 04 July 2003
Location: Norfolk, VA
Posts: 5,214
Read This!

I appreciate all the words of support.

Quote:
Originally Posted by Dr. Dave View Post
Thank you for sharing. Just to help walk this through- if you do not want to do that, please ignore and accept my apology for overstepping!

If I understand this correctly:
What you wrote is pretty much correct, only I already "told" everyone that I am getting out: it's just that I haven't submitted the official piece of paper that says "I'm getting out" because of some procedural requirements. More on that below.

Quote:
1. In May 2018, is that the end of a period of enlistment? A point where you need to be re-upped or out?
Sort of. I do have an incentive pay contract that runs out in April of 2018 and May 1st is the earliest I can get out, but absent any action on my part (either signing another incentive pay contract or submitting my resignation) I would still be in the Navy May 1st, just getting paid less. With officers, you serve "indefinitely at the pleasure of the President of the United States." In reality, though, my resignation would only go to the Secretary of the Navy, maybe even just the Admiral in charge of Navy Personnel Command. But the point is there is no “re-enlistment.” There is no "end of active obligated service" as there is for enlisted members. There's just "indefinitely" absent action on my part, a failure to promote, or (very) substandard performance.

Commissioned officers stay in until they either ask to get out or get kicked out (most commonly for failing to promote a couple times: up or out). Since I did get the promotion, it will be another... eight years before the Navy would "kick me out" just for failing promote. Anyways, I can still stay another 8 years and get a nice retirement out of it (half pay for the rest of my life and medical benefits). That's why getting the promotion was such a big deal, it’s like tenure for a college professor, but better (do college professors get a lifetime retirement that they don’t even have to pay into?). If I hadn't gotten it, I'd have been kicked out, well, right about now actually, with no retirement. If I could only stand to stick it out for eight more years (all the while being convinced I am utterly worthless and not at all valued by the Navy) then it sure would be a nice retirement.

Timing is very important for officer promotions, at least in my particular line of work: there are certain milestone jobs one must complete or be performing at the time you are "in zone" for promotion, or you don't stand a chance of promoting, no matter how good your record might have been up until that point. It was under such circumstances that I made my "deal with the devil" five years ago: I was convinced (rightly or wrongly we’ll never know) that if I sought treatment, the treatment would keep me from going onto the job (on a ship) in time to get promoted. Even though it would have been for a perfectly legitimate medical reason. Just like getting a broken leg. No stigma, it’s just that if you’re not a Department Head on a seagoing vessel by your eight year mark, you can start looking for work elsewhere, that’s all. Even if you were dealing with some real serious issues that needed to be dealt with. And you know what the real killer is? In classic "deal with the devil fashion"? Though it was rough at times, I did just fine in that job and honestly believed maybe I had fooled "the devil" and everything would turn out fine. Maybe I'd even get promoted again in a few years...

Quote:
2. Is there a customary or required length of time one gives before informing the Navy of the decision to separate or not re-enlist?
To separate as an officer, yes. Nine to twelve months, no more, no less. That's the requirement and that's part of the problem: if I wait to submit my official, signed resignation (even though I have verbally communicated my intent and sent e-mails explaining my intent to resign) then that means the earliest I can get out is nine months after that. So instead of being able to get out on 1MAY2018, it would be more like... I don't know... 1AUG2018 maybe?

Quote:
3. What is the typical length of time an officer of your rank stays in a given posting?
Not exactly based on rank, but yes. It's 24 months, which is why I can't transfer out of this job sooner.

So my choices are:

A) Stay in my current assignment (which is contributing to a lot of my problems) longer but get out of the Navy sooner (and my feelings about the Navy in general aren’t helping much either).

B) Get out of my current assignment as originally planned in a mere four months (with my relief on board next month!), but be required to stay in the Navy longer, maybe three months.

There are some other complexities associated with option A:

1) A bit of a cross-thread (with the autism “treatments” thread), but in general I can't be medicated and still be in my current assignment. So everything I’ve done up to this point has been good old-fashioned therapy and talking. The shitty thing is that I feel worse from talking about this stuff sometimes than from not. I mean, again, I went five or six years (and for one particular issue a decade) without talking about any of it. Just pushing it down. There are times when I leave the psych’s office fighting back tears on my way back to work.

2) As I said in my previous post, if I elect for option A they will send my relief elsewhere and leave me in the job almost another year. If I were to just completely fall apart right now, the unit wouldn't suffer much or for long: there would be someone else on hand to take over. But if I go with option A and I no longer have a named relief en route… well... I don't know for certain that I can function another year in this job. It'll be a rough year. And there won't be anyone to take over if therapy doesn't work out. Even if I don't completely break down, if the psych even prescribes, say, anti-depressants (it’s come up), that may medically disqualify me from holding my current job. And then who does the job?

3) There are people that work for me and with me, many of them fairly junior sailors, perhaps in vulnerable position themselves (one thing I have learned from personal experience is you never know what baggage people may be carrying at any given moment). I'm starting to have difficulty... It's not that I don't have empathy. If I didn't, this would be a lot easier, actually. It’s just that I'm having difficulty dealing with other people's issues while maybe not being in the best state of mind myself. I think it’s best if I don’t provide examples, but let's just say this is where my fear of "dragging other people down with me" comes from.

But with option B... It's hard to describe, but I think it will actually add on to at least one problem. I'll just say that these issues with "timing" and being too late or too early to do X, Y, or Z because "paperwork" and “procedures” has a lot to do with my tour in Iraq. It’s a constant reminder that I was in Iraq and how I feel about Iraq and how I found myself in a position to make “a deal with the devil” precisely because of my tour in Iraq and, had I not gone to Iraq, I'd already be out of this job and on shore duty and I wouldn't even have to deal with this shit. I probably, maybe anyways, wouldn’t even be resigning my commission: it’d be sticking around to retirement with somewhat less baggage to deal with along the way. Going to Iraq or Afghanistan was/is abnormal for someone in my particular line of work and the community doesn't really do much to account for that. But of course it says it does... But the really messed up thing is my biggest issue (in my mind) has nothing to do with Iraq. If it were, it’d be easier (I think): lots of people have been to Iraq and lots of people want to talk about Iraq. If only veterans’ mental health issues could all be neatly labeled as “I got PTSD in Iraq,” the world would be a better place…

Anyways, I spoke with my "boss" today about options A and B. Not about my "issues" of course (I really, really don't want to talk about my issues with him, he's part of the reason I'm getting out. Actually, as my resignation will state, he is THE reason I am getting out ASAP and not waiting until my next assignment) but that those were the options I was presented with and, in lieu of an option C, I intend to go with A. He's going to look into an option C, at least.

Option C would look something like:

C) Submit my resignation now, as desired, but work with the detailer (the guy who assigns people to various jobs) to not re-slate my relief so I could be sent elsewhere, whether via a permanent change of station or some "under the table" temporary duty (keep me officially in my current job, but have me show up for work somewhere else). But of course, that would be a terrible waste of money for the taxpayers and maybe not a sustainable business practice.

Last edited by ASL; 03 May 2017 at 09:56 PM. Reason: Line spacing.
Reply With Quote
  #34  
Old 04 May 2017, 12:55 AM
thorny locust's Avatar
thorny locust thorny locust is offline
 
Join Date: 27 April 2007
Location: Upstate NY
Posts: 7,856
Default

Quote:
Originally Posted by ASL View Post
if I elect for option A they will send my relief elsewhere and leave me in the job almost another year. If I were to just completely fall apart right now, the unit wouldn't suffer much or for long: there would be someone else on hand to take over. But if I go with option A and I no longer have a named relief en route… well... I don't know for certain that I can function another year in this job. It'll be a rough year. And there won't be anyone to take over if therapy doesn't work out. Even if I don't completely break down, if the psych even prescribes, say, anti-depressants (it’s come up), that may medically disqualify me from holding my current job. And then who does the job? [ . . . ] I'm having difficulty dealing with other people's issues while maybe not being in the best state of mind myself. I think it’s best if I don’t provide examples, but let's just say this is where my fear of "dragging other people down with me" comes from.

But with option B... It's hard to describe, but I think it will actually add on to at least one problem.

Anyways, I spoke with my "boss" today about options A and B. [ . . .] He's going to look into an option C, at least.

Option C would look something like:

C) Submit my resignation now, as desired, but work with the detailer (the guy who assigns people to various jobs) to not re-slate my relief so I could be sent elsewhere, whether via a permanent change of station or some "under the table" temporary duty (keep me officially in my current job, but have me show up for work somewhere else). But of course, that would be a terrible waste of money for the taxpayers and maybe not a sustainable business practice.
I'm entirely civilian, so if I'm saying something stupid here just let me know, but:

Wouldn't it be a worse cost of money for the taxpayers, and maybe not a sustainable business practice, to have you become unable to function at your job, possibly without a backup person ready to step in; and/or to have you continue semifunctional in the job because you were only able to barely hang on?

And I don't think in any case that it's a waste of money for the taxpayers to provide you with what you need. It seems to me that that ought to be part of the contract for armed forces jobs, particularly ones that either land people deliberately in harms' way and/or put them in the position of having to put other people there. Without that part of the contract, it seems to me there's less incentive both to join the military, and to do one's best while there: if nobody's really got your back if you get injured -- whatever type of injured -- I would think people would be a lot less willing to risk the injuries in the first place.

If you couldn't perform your intended job because of a broken leg, would you think it was an awful waste of the taxpayers' money for you to be shifted for the rest of your term into a job that could be done properly by somebody with a broken leg, and could be done without further damaging the leg?
Reply With Quote
  #35  
Old 04 May 2017, 01:43 AM
ASL's Avatar
ASL ASL is offline
 
Join Date: 04 July 2003
Location: Norfolk, VA
Posts: 5,214
Military

Quote:
Originally Posted by thorny locust View Post
I'm entirely civilian, so if I'm saying something stupid here just let me know, but:

Wouldn't it be a worse cost of money for the taxpayers, and maybe not a sustainable business practice, to have you become unable to function at your job, possibly without a backup person ready to step in; and/or to have you continue semifunctional in the job because you were only able to barely hang on?
Sure, but detailing has nothing to do with medical issues. Until such time as a medical professional says I can't do the job, I've got every qualification and, well, I took the money to do it, so I've got to do it, right? It's only fair... True story: an officer who requests to be relieved of their duties just because they feel they can't hack it anymore (absent a medical determination that such is the case) would be Detached For Cause the same as if they had committed serious misconduct. After all, they're called orders. Saying "I can't do this anymore" is indistinguishable from saying "I won't do this anymore." I'm hardly qualified to diagnose myself as having a debilitating mental illness, so what possible justification could I have for such a claim? It's not enough to be drowning. Someone has to observe you drowning. And head below water won't do: they've got to watch for a minute just to be sure. If you're the kind that doesn't thrash around much as you go down, you're in real trouble. Of course if you thrash around too much and you aren't actually drowning, well, then you're just a shitbag, even if you really are a bad swimmer and having a rough time keeping your head above water (but not exactly drowning).

I really don't know how it will turn out if I have to do this another year. Do I just breakdown? Do I become a discipline problem and get sent off for misconduct? Do I manage to keep my head above water and get kicked to the curb nice and clean like I want? It just really, really, really sucks knowing that nothing I do will make this better (my job satisfaction and specifically my relationship with my current "boss"), the best I can hope for is for it to not get worse. But it probably will get worse.

Quote:
If you couldn't perform your intended job because of a broken leg, would you think it was an awful waste of the taxpayers' money for you to be shifted for the rest of your term into a job that could be done properly by somebody with a broken leg, and could be done without further damaging the leg?
Of course it wouldn't. But it wouldn't be hard to confirm that the leg is really broken: the break could be directly examined via an x-ray. Mental health issues can go either way: they can really exist but be covered up through brilliant acting and a lot of luck (as I would say I've spent the last five or six years doing) or they can be manufactured by malingerers. I mean, shoot, how do we know I'm not just doing all this to get VA benefits, right?

Anyways, my mind isn't exactly broken, just degraded I'd say. To muddy the waters, it is entirely possible to have a diagnosed condition, even PTSD, and still be cleared to deploy, especially if you're willing to be deployed. Funny enough, I've actually told them (and am also including it in my resignation) that I would be willing to stay in just a little longer to go back to Iraq (it's complicated). But there really aren't that many jobs for nuclear-trained shiphandlers in Iraq these days. Not like the good old days, when the Army couldn't make it's recruiting numbers and needed the Navy to fill the gap in theater. Those were some high times, I tell you. And being in Iraq really focused the mind on the "here and now" (or "then and there").

But, yeah, I'd rather go back to Iraq than be here right now.
Reply With Quote
  #36  
Old 04 May 2017, 02:17 AM
Dr. Dave Dr. Dave is offline
 
Join Date: 28 June 2005
Location: Montgomery County, MD
Posts: 5,221
Default

I know it's really complicated, but I have the way as a completely outside observer that when I read your description I was thinking "B" all the way. A "C" would be best as long as you don't get screwed for it, but taking that off the table, it sounds like the choices are:

A 12 months in this situation which sounds unsustainable.

B. 4 months in that situation, including 3 with your relief on board to relieve some pressure, then 10-12 months in something hopefully a better fit. You would be trading 3 or 4 extra months in overall for 8 fewer months in this post and 11 fewer as the sole head in that section.

FWIW neither is at all "not fulfilling your commitment." So do what you think is best for you.

BTW, if the doctor said "this man need medication" and the current post is "this medication is a disqualifier" would the result be ok for you, or would you get screwed?
Reply With Quote
  #37  
Old 04 May 2017, 01:15 PM
thorny locust's Avatar
thorny locust thorny locust is offline
 
Join Date: 27 April 2007
Location: Upstate NY
Posts: 7,856
Default

Quote:
Originally Posted by ASL View Post
Of course it wouldn't. But it wouldn't be hard to confirm that the leg is really broken: the break could be directly examined via an x-ray. Mental health issues can go either way: they can really exist but be covered up through brilliant acting and a lot of luck (as I would say I've spent the last five or six years doing) or they can be manufactured by malingerers. I mean, shoot, how do we know I'm not just doing all this to get VA benefits, right?
Well, you know, presumably.

If you're worried that others will perceive it as your not earning what taxpayers have spent on you, that's one thing. But if you're worried about whether it's actually true: you know, I presume, that you're not malingering; so you shouldn't need to feel guilty about it.
Reply With Quote
  #38  
Old 12 June 2017, 08:31 PM
ASL's Avatar
ASL ASL is offline
 
Join Date: 04 July 2003
Location: Norfolk, VA
Posts: 5,214
Roll eyes

Well, my command, the detailer, and I have gone with option A: resign ASAP (in a year) but stay with the current command until that date (eight months longer than I would have with option B). But maybe not. It turns out there's an option D, which I will refer to ironically as the "nuclear option" because, actually, it would very likely result in me being "de-nuked" (that is, they would decide I am no longer medically fit to perform my primary duties, as a surface nuclear propulsion engineer).

I'm not sure how it's going to turn out, but it looks like I've got a fitness for duty determination scheduled for next month that will determine if, in fact, it's option D or we stay with option A. In the meantime, I've decided I find it easier (relative term) to concentrate on my day job without any sort of therapy, so I guess we'll see. "I can do anything for a month..." is what I started telling myself in Iraq. Then it was "I can do anything for three weeks." Two and a half weeks. Two weeks. 12 days... 10 days... 9... 8.... 7... 6... 5... You get the picture.
Reply With Quote
  #39  
Old 12 June 2017, 08:40 PM
Dr. Dave Dr. Dave is offline
 
Join Date: 28 June 2005
Location: Montgomery County, MD
Posts: 5,221
Default

ASL, I wish you the best possible outcome. And whatever (healthy) coping mechanism you have, go for it.
Reply With Quote
  #40  
Old 13 June 2017, 05:55 PM
DawnStorm's Avatar
DawnStorm DawnStorm is offline
 
Join Date: 11 March 2003
Location: Montgomery County, MD
Posts: 15,367
Default

Yeah, whatever works. Don't forget your online rooting section!
Reply With Quote
Reply

Thread Tools
Display Modes

Posting Rules
You may not post new threads
You may not post replies
You may not post attachments
You may not edit your posts

BB code is On
Smilies are On
[IMG] code is On
HTML code is On

Forum Jump

Similar Threads
Thread Thread Starter Forum Replies Last Post
San Diego Sports Curse fozcat Sports 0 03 May 2012 06:45 AM
Prayer request for Diego Mendez snopes Inboxer Rebellion 1 24 August 2011 05:44 PM
Obama underwrites off shore oil drilling in BRAZIL snopes Politics 0 05 February 2010 03:09 AM
Emergency Shore Landing Jenn Fauxtography 3 08 August 2009 05:19 AM
San Diego Fire photo Silas Sparkhammer Fauxtography 37 11 December 2007 06:57 AM


All times are GMT. The time now is 11:01 AM.


Powered by vBulletin® Version 3.8.7
Copyright ©2000 - 2017, vBulletin Solutions, Inc.