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  #1  
Old 25 June 2013, 05:37 PM
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Roll eyes U.S. Navy: No Record of Cap地 Crunch Service

A new scandal is consuming the U.S. Navy and one of the world痴 most venerated captains: Cap地 Crunch.

The legendary cereal icon痴 status as a captain has come under fire after eagle-eyed writers noticed that Cap地 Crunch only wears the bars of a Navy commander, not those of a captain. In the U.S. Navy, captains wear four bars on their uniforms, while commanders one rank below captain have three bars.

http://blogs.wsj.com/washwire/2013/0...runch-service/
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  #2  
Old 25 June 2013, 05:47 PM
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The officer in charge of a boat or ship is often referred to as "captain" even if he or she does not hold that official rank.

Also, he is "Cap'n" Crunch, not Captain Crunch.
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  #3  
Old 25 June 2013, 06:53 PM
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That begs the question: Is Count Chocula TRULY a Count? And how did he inherit that title anyways???

Edit: Cap'n Crunch is called "Capitaine Counche" en Francais.

OY
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  #4  
Old 26 June 2013, 12:05 AM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by GenYus234 View Post
The officer in charge of a boat or ship is often referred to as "captain" even if he or she does not hold that official rank.

Also, he is "Cap'n" Crunch, not Captain Crunch.
I am sure I heard that the official Cap'n Crunch twitter account says just that. He is a captain by nature of captaining a ship.

Did "he's also a fictitious character so there obviously wouldn't be a record in the Navy" dy
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  #5  
Old 26 June 2013, 12:11 AM
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I suppose the next "scandal" will be the relevation that my Admiral top-loading washer never actually achieved flag rank.
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  #6  
Old 26 June 2013, 12:57 AM
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Count Chocula doesn't sparkle!
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Old 26 June 2013, 01:02 AM
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Apparently, not only does the Cap'n have a twitter account (where he labels himself as a "breakfast connoisseur", he also has a YouTube show where he addresses the rumor directly.

I couldn't resist.
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  #8  
Old 26 June 2013, 01:19 AM
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"My eyebrows are attached to my hat for crunch sake!"
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  #9  
Old 26 June 2013, 03:34 AM
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He is defiantly acting captain of the ship what ever is rank may be. We also can assume that he is not a member of any modern large navy and the one he is in uses 3 bars for captain.

I always though Cap’n Crunch's navy was a fleet of one ship with the Cap'n being the highest rank.
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  #10  
Old 26 June 2013, 03:37 AM
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Well, he's no stranger to controversy. He sailed through the storm over his inphamous phone phreaking whistle and I expect he'll get through this as well. Don't tell them anything until you get a lawyer and a bottle of milk, Cap'n!

Wait, I think I just solved the mystery. There's no rank in any Navy called "Cap'n". So there. (Gah. How'mI s'posed to think of anything new when there's a GenYus about.)
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  #11  
Old 26 June 2013, 03:22 PM
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As an actual friend (as opposed to you imaginary ones) asked, what about Captain Kangaroo? Spending only 1 year in the USMC, it is unlikely that he achieved the rank of Captain.
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Old 26 June 2013, 03:27 PM
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Have they also checked with the Coast Guard? The only time I saw Cap'n Crunch at an identified body of water was at Lake Michigan, when they drained it and filled it with milk to prove Cap'n Crunch stays crunchy, even in milk.
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Old 26 June 2013, 04:56 PM
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Before jumping the shark and going off the deep end, they should answer the important questions: Is Cap'n Crunch's island even part of the US?

If it's not, then the point is moot. A foreign national's rank is recognized, but that person has no authority outside his nation's limits.

The Cap'n has only claimed to be the captain of the S.S. Guppy. Note, that's S.S. not U.S.S. or H.M.C.S. or H.M.S. ...
so he's not claiming to be a captain on an US ship, a Canadian ship or a British ship.

Quote:
Originally Posted by overyonder View Post
Edit: Cap'n Crunch is called "Capitaine Counche" en Francais.

OY
Pedantry Ahoy! it's Crounche
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  #14  
Old 26 June 2013, 06:01 PM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Alarm View Post
Pedantry Ahoy! it's Crounche
Une coquille.

(ah-)OY!
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  #15  
Old 26 June 2013, 06:23 PM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Alarm View Post
The Cap'n has only claimed to be the captain of the S.S. Guppy. Note, that's S.S. not U.S.S. or H.M.C.S. or H.M.S. ...
so he's not claiming to be a captain on an US ship, a Canadian ship or a British ship.
But the guy in charge of the S.S. Minnow only held the title of "Skipper," not "Captain." Why the discrepancy?
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  #16  
Old 26 June 2013, 06:51 PM
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He was Dutch.
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  #17  
Old 26 June 2013, 07:05 PM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by overyonder View Post
(ah-)OY!
I saw what you did there. Well played, mon ami.
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  #18  
Old 26 June 2013, 07:32 PM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by snopes View Post
But the guy in charge of the S.S. Minnow only held the title of "Skipper," not "Captain." Why the discrepancy?
The S.S. Minnow crashed on a deserted island, didn't it?

That's a big difference right there: the quality of the person in command of the ship!
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  #19  
Old 26 June 2013, 07:51 PM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Alarm View Post
The S.S. Minnow crashed on a deserted island, didn't it?
Yes, thanks to the Skipper's superior seamanship! With anyone else in charge, the boat would simply have vanished at sea, its passengers and crew lost forever.
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  #20  
Old 26 June 2013, 07:55 PM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Alarm View Post
The S.S. Minnow crashed on a deserted island, didn't it?

That's a big difference right there: the quality of the person in command of the ship!
Oh, is that it? http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Costa_Concordia_disaster
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