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  #841  
Old 12 July 2018, 03:09 PM
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Seaboe Muffinchucker Seaboe Muffinchucker is offline
 
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Crocoduck, you have my sympathy, but the longer you put it off, the harder it will be.

Ask yourself, what is the worst thing that can happen? Do you think he'll attack you? Do you think he will be rude? Do you think he'll ignore you? I find going through this exercise makes it easier to speak up.

Seaboe

Last edited by Seaboe Muffinchucker; 12 July 2018 at 03:34 PM.
  #842  
Old 12 July 2018, 05:16 PM
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If it's the first, maybe you could talk to him while there are others around?

I mean, I wouldn't come up to him with a large group; but maybe with one friend with you, or at a time of day when lots of other people are around outside, if there is such a time.

-- is there any sort of building association, or neighborhood association, you could bring it up with? is there a block party or some other situation at which you could start talking with him about something else, and bring it up casually in the middle of the discussion? 'by the way, you probably don't realize it, but . . . '

But I also again don't know the neighborhood, or crocoduck_hunter's history. I wouldn't expect such a conversation to lead to some sort of long-term harassing grudge, but I can't guarantee that it couldn't happen.

I have, however, had to ask people to move smoke away from a bedroom window; and they moved.
  #843  
Old 12 July 2018, 06:46 PM
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I haven't seen or smelled him since yesterday morning. I don't know if he's still around.
  #844  
Old 12 July 2018, 07:08 PM
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Let's hope he's just quietly gone away again, rendering this entire discussion moot.

Maybe he was only visiting somebody for a couple of days, and won't be back, or at least will be back only rarely and briefly.

Or maybe somebody else asked him to smoke elsewhere, and he's complying.
  #845  
Old 12 July 2018, 07:26 PM
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No idea, but it'd be great if it's any of the above.
  #846  
Old 13 July 2018, 12:25 PM
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I have a similar question- I live in a twin and for the last weekish, I have been hearing muffled bass sounds from the neighbor's side. At first I couldn't hear it when I went to bed, but if I don't have my fan on, I can hear it past 10 pm sometimes. Would it be rude to leave a note in their mailbox? I have never met them, just seen from afar.
  #847  
Old 13 July 2018, 01:47 PM
Kermor Kermor is offline
 
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Peel-off plastic on meals. Why are they so difficult to peel off ? I can't count the number of times I had to use a knife to get to the food inside.
  #848  
Old 13 July 2018, 02:20 PM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by sneeze042 View Post
Would it be rude to leave a note in their mailbox? I have never met them, just seen from afar.
In the past, I have received one such message in the mailbox from someone I did not really know. They informed me of something I did not realise was going on. I was not offended as the note was written in a courteous and respectful tone. And I had no problem changing the circumstances that prompted the note.

Your neighbour may not know that their behaviour is being experienced outside their apartment.

I'm confident that a politely worded note, an offer to go for a coffee to get to know a neighbour in the future, and a smile will smooth over any feathers that may be ruffled.
  #849  
Old 13 July 2018, 02:32 PM
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We had an ugly situation in our neighbourhood recently when an anonymous note was left in one neighbour's mailbox complaining about an ongoing issue. The note was profane and very nasty. The problem was because it was anonymous Neighbour A jumped to the conclusion that it had been left there by Neighbour B. So they wrote their own note attached to the first note and put in in Neighbour B's mailbox. So Neighbour A and B are both angry and upset at each other but the original note was written by a third party who hasn't stepped forward to admit to it in the ensuing confabs. Sigh. It's Peyton Place around here.
  #850  
Old 13 July 2018, 04:15 PM
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I'm a member of a Facebook neighbourhood group and someone made a very long post asking for assistance in staging a complaint to the local council about a gym that was blasting music from 7am until late at night. They were VERY angry about the situation and had already made multiple complaints and were very upset that the situation hadn't been amended.

Eventually someone joined the conversation and told them that the music wasn't coming from the gym but from a different business across the road.
  #851  
Old 13 July 2018, 05:15 PM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Sue View Post
We had an ugly situation in our neighbourhood recently when an anonymous note was left in one neighbour's mailbox complaining about an ongoing issue.
That was a difference with mine. The neighbours wrote down their name and number. So, I knew who it was from.

On the other hand, it was because my little dog had dug a hole under their fence that adjoins my back yard, I would have figured out who it was regardless.
  #852  
Old 13 July 2018, 07:14 PM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Sue View Post
Sigh. It's Peyton Place around here.
But are they Harper Valley hypocrites?
  #853  
Old 13 July 2018, 08:24 PM
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I wouldn't use an anonymous note. It's the height of passive aggressive. I would find it extremely annoying to receive such a note.

Depending on what the content was, I might also be disinclined to do something about it because I have no idea who I am affecting. If say my cigar smoking is bother someone I wouldn't know how to adjust it as I don't know where the issue is.

I'd also say that many people would find such an approach either disrespectful of childish.

I have a neighbor who lives across the street and down a couple doors who I've had issues with in the past. She will come right over knock on my door and tell me what's going on. We've never failed to work something out to her satisfaction. Although I don't always agree with her, I respect the hell out of her approach.
  #854  
Old 13 July 2018, 08:40 PM
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I know that my neighbour is a bit of a hot head who can get riled up really easily if he feels he's being backed into a corner so when I had a problem with him (some of the branches on one of my trees was slightly encroaching on his yard so his builders reached over into my yard and cut the entire tree down) I felt that writing him a signed note was the least confrontational approach and gave him room to mull it over in his own time.
  #855  
Old 13 July 2018, 09:36 PM
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I agree that the note should be signed -- and, if the signature alone won't clarify who you are, add 'your neighbor in Apt 27', or whatever.

While talking to the neighbor in person may go over better with some people, a signed and polite note may go over better with others; and may also be easier to accomplish, as you don't have to catch the person at home, let alone at a convenient time for both of you. In either case, if the note's both polite and signed, I wouldn't consider it rude. I'd try to phrase it along the lines of 'you probably don't realize that x is affecting me'. You could suggest meeting with them to discuss it if they want to do that.


-- Kermor, I've occasionally suggested that future archaeologists will eventually conclude that our civilization was destroyed when most of its citizens starved to death surrounded by food packages that they couldn't get open.
  #856  
Old 13 July 2018, 10:52 PM
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The fact that people interpret an RSVP date as a suggestion. Come on, people, it's a wedding.... we need head counts.... :/


I know I'm just going to end up having to make calls and it's not the end of the world, but it's disappointing to go to the trouble of sending the pre-addressed, pre-stamped return envelopes only to have almost half our RSVPS still unaccounted for after the "please respond by" date...
  #857  
Old 13 July 2018, 11:49 PM
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In my view, a signed note is good enough and a far cry from an anonymous note.
  #858  
Old 16 July 2018, 03:44 PM
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The "Skip This Ad" button in YouTube is now, "Skip towards the end of this ad" and includes several seconds of a vanity card instead of going to the video.
  #859  
Old 16 July 2018, 04:08 PM
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Ha, I was going to post something else but I've just been annoyed by YouTube video adverts as well. Specifically, apart from their seeming to be far more of them than there used to be (interrupting half-way through shortish videos, adding multiple banner ads even to videos that have ads at the start and in the interim), this time there was also a pop-up to ask me to subscribe to YouTube Premium to avoid them!

I would much rather subscribe to the content providers than the infrastructure provider...

(eta) The other thing I was going to post is more of a First World Problem so I am not even going to put it here.
  #860  
Old 16 July 2018, 08:11 PM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by GenYus234 View Post
The "Skip This Ad" button in YouTube is now, "Skip towards the end of this ad" and includes several seconds of a vanity card instead of going to the video.
A few weeks ago, something was screwy with my computer and Adblock wasn't working. It was unbearable watching anything on youtube during that time. There were programs I watched that had designated ad times, but the ads would just come up any old time, it seemed. I guess, determined by video length or something.
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