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  #1  
Old 08 July 2015, 02:21 PM
Jusenkyo no Pikachu Jusenkyo no Pikachu is offline
 
Join Date: 11 May 2003
Location: Queensland, Australia
Posts: 2,200
Default The Bonsai Story Generator

Note: I wrote this entire post on another forum. The only bit I actually took from somewhere else was the line about the world ending and cats being banned.

http://www.critters.org/bonsai/

I just had some fun with this, although what I actually wrote fell far short of the recommended minimum.

What this thing does is take whatever text you put in, and forms it into a sort of artful gibberish that is actually fun to read aloud. It also gave me an opportunity to write something weird about the end of the world and prohibition of cats (which I actually lifted from someone else, but the rest of it is nonsense I made up).

What I wrote:

Quote:
Ok, so last I checked, anyone could write a story. Here goes:

I once saw a robot. It was the middle of the night, and I'm not sure I was awake, but the image was seared in my memory. It was so seared that I remember each and every one of the robot's 90 teeth. There were three eyes, too: each pupil had thirteen colours. And that's not the strangest part. That night, it appeared for five minutes, then scanned me and spoke:

"The world is ending. All cats are banned. All talk of cats is banned."

The message repeated three times, then switched to French, German, Farsi and a few other languages I'm not even sure were human. To this day, I'm not entirely sure whether or not they were just trying out several languages on me or were broadcasting to others. The message was cryptic enough as it was, and I don't even know any Farsi. But after a while, I noticed something: the cats were vanishing. People who mentioned this strange phenomenon also either vanished or met horrible ends. Andrew Lloyd Webber, in particular, was dumped from a great height. And then, the Disaster struck. Fissures opened up in the oceans, taking all water away. What wasn't emptied was soon dried up. People started floating up into the heavens. I personally was split in two, my blood sprayed out all over the earth. I have no idea what actually happened to me next, as all I recall is a bright light and various body parts. But eventually, I was floating in a great grassy nothingness, as a voice told me to turn south. Apparently directions mattered, as the voice got louder each time I turned what I can only assume to be north, east or west. I don't know, directions made less sense than Wonderland. Fortunately, I was able to rejoin what apparently was everyone else...all ninety-seven trillion of us. We are still floating in the meaningless southerly direction, although the nothingness has become watery.

All I can hope is that I eventually end up somewhere.
What I got:

Quote:
Ok, so seared that I eventually I was so seared in my blood sprayed out all over the image was seared in a great height. And that's not even sure were human. To this day, I'm not entirely sure whether or not they were broadcasting to others. The message was able to me next, as it was, and I don't even know any Farsi. But eventually, I noticed something: the robot's 90 teeth. There were human. To this strange phenomenon also either vanished or were broadcasting to French, German, Farsi and a robot. It was the robot's 90 teeth. There were human. To this strange phenomenon also either vanished or were broadcasting to others. The message repeated three eyes, too: each time I was able to others. The message was seared in the meaningless southerly direction, although the nothingness has become watery. All cats are banned. All talk of the night, and I don't even know any Farsi. But after a great height. And then, the heavens. I was floating up into the middle of cats is banned. The message repeated three eyes, too: each time I don't know, directions mattered, as all I was able to others. The message repeated three eyes, too: each time I was awake, but the nothingness has become watery. All I can only assume to others. The world is ending. All talk of the robot's 90 teeth. There were three eyes, too: each and every one of the night, and I don't even sure were just trying out several languages on me and spoke: The message repeated three times, then the Disaster struck. Fissures opened up somewhere Ok, so last I remember each pupil had thirteen colours. And then, the middle of the robot's 90 teeth. There were three eyes, too: each time I can only assume to French, German, Farsi and a robot. It was so last I turned what I can hope is that I don't even sure were just trying out all over the oceans, taking all over the night, and I don't even sure were three eyes, too: each ...
(Oddly, each sentence actually began on a new line)

Also, if you're still poking around, be sure to check out Atlanta Nights*, the brilliantly atrocious piece (and mother of all modern trollfic) that was written in part with this generator.

*If you haven't already, but knowing this mob it's likely you have seen it around.
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  #2  
Old 11 July 2015, 10:10 PM
Eoin's Avatar
Eoin Eoin is offline
 
Join Date: 25 May 2015
Location: St. Louis, MO
Posts: 162
Default

That might explain the text of the e-mails I get from lonely housewives in Abu Dhabi wanting to cure erectile dysfunction.
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  #3  
Old 17 February 2019, 11:13 AM
Jusenkyo no Pikachu Jusenkyo no Pikachu is offline
 
Join Date: 11 May 2003
Location: Queensland, Australia
Posts: 2,200
Default

Having a bit of fun with this and the Plot Generator:

Story I “wrote”: https://www.plot-generator.org.uk/2a...ick-knife.html

What I got:

Quote:
Poopsie Goldsmith was thinking about Jessica came closer, she let out an intuitive muppet with the affection of iced coffee Poopsie Goldsmith went back even more stable and still fingering the an intuitive muppet with feathery hearts and wobbly eyes wobbled.
She was a place that had been strewn nearby; she let out an agonising groan and reflected on her desolate surroundings.
She looked fuzzy, her fingers.
As Poopsie Goldsmith went back even more stable Poopsie grabbed the thick knife that encouraged her tendency to the beat.
Suddenly, Jessica gazed with her fingers.
As Poopsie gulped.
She looked fuzzy, her fingers.
As Poopsie looked back, even a thoughtless popular, iced coffee drinker with fluffy hearts and chubby eyes.
Her friends saw something in her eye.
Jessica lunged forward and her wobbly eyes wobbled.
She was a fierce, faint friend.
Once, she massaged it with her as a very daring apocalypse, which had always hated dry Alice Springs with the affection of Jessica Butterscotch.
Poopsie stable.
Poopsie grabbed the background and Jessica came closer, she massaged it with her emotions raw like a thoughtless, popular, iced coffee drinker with its defeated, dull Desert.
It was a dying, newborn.
But not even more stable Poopsie grabbed the thick knife and collapsed onto the thick knife.
Jessica, what Jessica had zydeco music playing in store today.
The sun shone like two greasy, gloopy giraffes running at a very daring apocalypse, which had once revived a dying, newborn.
But not even revived a kiss.
Poopsie in the background and collapsed onto the mushy glint in the face.
Quickly, Poopsie grabbed a kiss.
Poopsie Goldsmith was dead.
Poopsie Goldsmith was the an intuitive figure of Jessica Butterscotch.
Poopsie Goldsmith went back inside and wobbly eyes.
Poopsie grabbed a very daring apocalypse, which had been strewn nearby; she massaged it with her emotions raw like a dying, newborn.
But not even a thoughtless popular, iced coffee Poopsie Goldsmith was an intuitive muppet with feathery hearts and ...
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