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Search took 0.03 seconds. Search: Posts Made By: smittykins
Forum: Rantidote 20 February 2019, 02:53 PM
Replies: 283
Views: 38,797
Posted By smittykins
Over a caricature of Obama: “I tried to...

Over a caricature of Obama:

“I tried to destroy the country. But Trump won the election and the libs are still crying. And my wife is a man.”
Forum: Rantidote 14 February 2019, 11:49 PM
Replies: 650
Views: 46,299
Posted By smittykins
At the clinic where I have PT and OT, the toilets...

At the clinic where I have PT and OT, the toilets flush twice: once when I stand up, and once when I leave the stall.
Forum: Soapbox Derby 06 February 2019, 07:47 PM
Replies: 15
Views: 930
Posted By smittykins
I love that quote, Dawn. Only it’s “your night...

I love that quote, Dawn. Only it’s “your night was shot.”[/nitpick]

smitty”We’re gonna miss ‘Flipper’!”kins
Forum: Amusement Bark 05 February 2019, 07:48 PM
Replies: 899
Views: 322,047
Posted By smittykins
Yesterday, on the way home from the laundromat, I...

Yesterday, on the way home from the laundromat, I heard a radio commercial for a mattress place. A woman begins by saying her washer broke not long ago(stay with me here). She has two kids, she...
Forum: Rantidote 04 February 2019, 05:13 PM
Replies: 650
Views: 46,299
Posted By smittykins
And IIRC, the NFL tried(unsuccessfully)to...

And IIRC, the NFL tried(unsuccessfully)to trademark “The Big Game” several years ago.
Forum: Amusement Bark 04 February 2019, 05:03 PM
Replies: 899
Views: 322,047
Posted By smittykins
Not Super Bowl-related, but it gets hard to watch...

Not Super Bowl-related, but it gets hard to watch Forensic Files on HLN when you have to deal with “Build The Wall!” ads every commercial break.
Forum: SLC 01 February 2019, 08:29 PM
Replies: 181
Views: 51,111
Posted By smittykins
Ever since it opened, I assumed that the casino...

Ever since it opened, I assumed that the casino in my area (https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Del_Lago_Resort_and_Casino) was Native American-owned. Turns out, it isn’t.
Forum: Wild Kingdom 01 February 2019, 08:16 PM
Replies: 816
Views: 304,220
Posted By smittykins
Bonsai Kitten I’d vote for him! ETA: Is he 35 in cat...

I’d vote for him!

ETA: Is he 35 in cat years? :D
Forum: SLC 29 January 2019, 08:43 PM
Replies: 260
Views: 16,848
Posted By smittykins
Sorry for your loss, GM.

Sorry for your loss, GM.
Forum: Rantidote 20 January 2019, 05:54 PM
Replies: 283
Views: 38,797
Posted By smittykins
I’ve definitely seen “mongoloid” in reference to...

I’ve definitely seen “mongoloid” in reference to DS.
Forum: Rantidote 18 January 2019, 11:02 PM
Replies: 283
Views: 38,797
Posted By smittykins
There’s still “ZOMG TEH AUTIZM!!1!1”, no matter...

There’s still “ZOMG TEH AUTIZM!!1!1”, no matter how many times it’s been debunked.
Forum: Wild Kingdom 18 January 2019, 10:51 PM
Replies: 816
Views: 304,220
Posted By smittykins
“Come and get me, girls, I don’t know I’m...

“Come and get me, girls, I don’t know I’m neutered.*”

*I assume he is, anyway. :lol:
Forum: Rantidote 17 January 2019, 07:21 PM
Replies: 283
Views: 38,797
Posted By smittykins
1955: “Timmy has measles. Go over and play with...

1955: “Timmy has measles. Go over and play with him so you can get them and get it over with.”

2015: “Timmy isn’t vaccinated. If you play with him, you might DIE!”

(Note to self: Don’t read...
Forum: SLC 14 January 2019, 08:32 PM
Replies: 540
Views: 55,574
Posted By smittykins
I’ve seen “splitties”(pre-67) go for six figures...

I’ve seen “splitties”(pre-67) go for six figures at certain auctions.
Forum: Rantidote 11 January 2019, 07:41 PM
Replies: 283
Views: 38,797
Posted By smittykins
From the same person: “A wall doesn’t say...

From the same person:

“A wall doesn’t say “Keep out.” It says “Go in through the door(legally).”
Forum: Amusement Bark 08 January 2019, 07:26 PM
Replies: 15
Views: 1,322
Posted By smittykins
The Captain and Tennille was my first concert, at...

The Captain and Tennille was my first concert, at the New York State Fair in 1976. In my defense, I was ten.
Forum: Rantidote 02 January 2019, 05:05 PM
Replies: 283
Views: 38,797
Posted By smittykins
“Why is it that statues that have been standing...

“Why is it that statues that have been standing for 100 years are suddenly offensive, and a man walking down the street showing his ass isn’t?”(This person seems to have an obsession with saggy...
Forum: Rantidote 25 December 2018, 07:27 PM
Replies: 913
Views: 324,681
Posted By smittykins
Baseball If you have your MLB The Show season set to have...

If you have your MLB The Show season set to have the CPU control trades for your team, don’t be surprised if one of your best players gets traded.
Forum: Rantidote 24 December 2018, 06:06 PM
Replies: 283
Views: 38,797
Posted By smittykins
"Closing our borders isn't heartless. If I close...

"Closing our borders isn't heartless. If I close my door, it doesn't mean I hate the people outside. It means I love the people inside."
Forum: Wild Kingdom 22 December 2018, 07:31 PM
Replies: 816
Views: 304,220
Posted By smittykins
Shadow’s Christmas present from...

Shadow’s Christmas present from Grandma(unfortunately, it does tend to tip, so I had to put a couple of heavy books in the “condo” part to stabilize it).

https://flic.kr/p/2cih4XZ
Forum: Fun House 22 December 2018, 07:17 PM
Replies: 31
Views: 2,510
Posted By smittykins
When I first saw that(before I clicked on it)I...

When I first saw that(before I clicked on it)I was thinking “Where Oh Where Are You Tonight” from Hee Haw.
Forum: Wild Kingdom 20 December 2018, 04:33 PM
Replies: 623
Views: 214,540
Posted By smittykins
I was just thinking about Silence the other day. ...

I was just thinking about Silence the other day. I’m glad she’s been spotted.
Forum: Social Studies 16 December 2018, 04:03 PM
Replies: 75
Views: 6,406
Posted By smittykins
I seem to recall a story about a man who worked...

I seem to recall a story about a man who worked in an auto plant for 50-plus years and never took a sick day or vacation day, and was hailed for his work ethic. Upon retirement, he was given a brand...
Forum: Soapbox Derby 16 December 2018, 03:57 PM
Replies: 35
Views: 7,206
Posted By smittykins
And Facebook didn't exist(or wasn't as popular as...

And Facebook didn't exist(or wasn't as popular as it is now), so we didn't have to read stuff like "Instead of arming teachers with guns, maybe we should arm parents with belts and switches. It...
Forum: Fun House 13 December 2018, 08:25 PM
Replies: 31
Views: 2,510
Posted By smittykins
“Kill the wabbit, kill the wabbit, kill the...

“Kill the wabbit, kill the wabbit, kill the wabbit...”
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