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Search took 0.01 seconds. Search: Posts Made By: boogers
Forum: SLC 02 May 2013, 02:25 AM
Replies: 949
Views: 93,272
Posted By boogers
Space aliens with tubes coming out of their...

Space aliens with tubes coming out of their nostrils like to put dead people in your bed. They generally don't explain why, nor do they remove the body when you ask them to.:confused:
Forum: The Doctor Is In 02 May 2013, 01:33 AM
Replies: 1
Views: 625
Posted By boogers
There was a guy like that out here who frequently...

There was a guy like that out here who frequently sent messages to the papers about how he'd given up meat, then given up dairy, then given up cooked food because, hey man, it was like, unnatural....
Forum: History 02 May 2013, 01:09 AM
Replies: 10
Views: 1,096
Posted By boogers
I thought Lenin said that right before a terrible...

I thought Lenin said that right before a terrible famine. Has anyone checked Smith's grave to see if a body is still in it?
Forum: SLC 01 May 2013, 06:44 AM
Replies: 808
Views: 43,471
Posted By boogers
Ok, after he jumped behind the clerk in a store...

Ok, after he jumped behind the clerk in a store Gudrun just blew her away. He jumped out a window with her chasing him. He helped her out becouse he was a Gentleman. Then he ran some more. But...
Forum: SLC 01 May 2013, 06:16 AM
Replies: 808
Views: 43,471
Posted By boogers
Great, I think I just stayed up too late and...

Great, I think I just stayed up too late and accidently wrote a story. Lee Harvey Oswald has been reincarted as a mute nun who is obsessed with Peter Greenawy movies. She hangs out in the book room...
Forum: Wild Kingdom 24 April 2013, 08:37 PM
Replies: 744
Views: 91,550
Posted By boogers
Don't worry about it, my ringneck parrot tried to...

Don't worry about it, my ringneck parrot tried to burn the house down 3 times. To him it was just a good day's work.

To Louisiana: That was my wig falling off, not my head. You can calm down now.
Forum: Wild Kingdom 24 April 2013, 08:26 PM
Replies: 23
Views: 1,158
Posted By boogers
Just end the controversy by releasing praying...

Just end the controversy by releasing praying mantises. Kids think mantises are cool so they'll watch them in hopes they catch a fly--and you can do your shopping in peace.
Forum: SLC 20 April 2013, 11:20 PM
Replies: 808
Views: 43,471
Posted By boogers
Vanishing I've been putting pictures of Lexington KY online...

I've been putting pictures of Lexington KY online and to add commentary I've looked up a lot of articles and stories about Lexington. Last night I found a vanishing hitchhiker story in which the...
Forum: SLC 20 April 2013, 01:51 PM
Replies: 949
Views: 93,272
Posted By boogers
The history of communism makes a great musical....

The history of communism makes a great musical. Don't forget to use The Door's song The End for the Stalinist terror and famines.
Forum: We've Got Mail 17 April 2013, 11:42 PM
Replies: 249
Views: 38,896
Posted By boogers
It is truth, they were the most becoming...

It is truth, they were the most becoming Christians ever! All the other Indians were jealous of their good looks and proper manners.
Forum: Rantidote 14 April 2013, 03:07 AM
Replies: 966
Views: 52,791
Posted By boogers
LTTAM: Cockatiels fighting over possession of my...

LTTAM: Cockatiels fighting over possession of my head, especially when I'm wearing my wig. I had an operation for a subdural hematoma last winter so I need to wear that wig till my hair grows back...
Forum: Religion 12 April 2013, 01:03 PM
Replies: 103
Views: 4,929
Posted By boogers
Eye witness? When I was a kid we all knew that...

Eye witness? When I was a kid we all knew that blue jays went to Hell on the weekends to help gather firewood (this was before Hell got central heating) but I didn't know the nuns were in on it too.
Forum: SLC 05 April 2013, 06:47 PM
Replies: 48
Views: 3,239
Posted By boogers
Why were I and my generic sidekick the only ones...

Why were I and my generic sidekick the only ones who noticed all those terrorists on the plane? How were the terrorists going to hijack the plane if they had died more than 30 years ago? Why did the...
Forum: SLC 16 March 2013, 11:01 PM
Replies: 999
Views: 66,308
Posted By boogers
I'm not feeling so great--minor sinus symptoms...

I'm not feeling so great--minor sinus symptoms mostly--and the Weather Underground site tells me there is a lot of juniper and elm pollen in the area. It doesn't tell me where to get a blowtorch or...
Forum: SLC 02 March 2013, 09:44 AM
Replies: 999
Views: 66,308
Posted By boogers
I'm currently at my childhood home--Lexington...

I'm currently at my childhood home--Lexington Ky--and the house hasn't changed much. There are different trees in the backyard and a lot more squirrels than there used to be but that's about all. The...
Forum: Social Studies 14 January 2013, 04:45 AM
Replies: 60
Views: 6,331
Posted By boogers
I wanted to be Mighty Thor when I was a kid, but...

I wanted to be Mighty Thor when I was a kid, but my mom wouldn't let me throw hammers at people. Such a mean mom.:D
Forum: Entertainment 06 January 2013, 09:06 PM
Replies: 13
Views: 6,564
Posted By boogers
Reminds me of a joke we all used to share, which...

Reminds me of a joke we all used to share, which was that the government had a giant computer which stored all the information on you. If you ever hacked the computer, you would find that the...
Forum: Glurge Gallery 25 December 2012, 02:58 AM
Replies: 7
Views: 4,932
Posted By boogers
God stages a killing because he needs some extra...

God stages a killing because he needs some extra kids? I always thought that dude was a bit odd but I didn't know he'd resort to this.
Forum: Wild Kingdom 06 November 2012, 10:20 PM
Replies: 744
Views: 91,550
Posted By boogers
When you have too tell your bird that it screams...

When you have too tell your bird that it screams so loud it's heard five miles off so it couldn't be a spy for the CIA...well it was disappointing to her. But it was something of a relief. She...
Forum: Wild Kingdom 06 November 2012, 06:45 PM
Replies: 218
Views: 27,105
Posted By boogers
But it could be worse. I could have told the...

But it could be worse. I could have told the reincarnation of Ulrike to just hang out for a while.:fish:
Forum: Wild Kingdom 06 November 2012, 06:23 PM
Replies: 218
Views: 27,105
Posted By boogers
You're a reincarnation of Ulrike Meinhof? Hold...

You're a reincarnation of Ulrike Meinhof? Hold still while I call Homeland Security.

Yes, my bird thinks this is a big joke.
Forum: Wild Kingdom 05 November 2012, 01:15 PM
Replies: 744
Views: 91,550
Posted By boogers
"Hail Satan to you too Beelzebub!" is probably...

"Hail Satan to you too Beelzebub!" is probably not something you typically tell your pet but if your satan worshipper--I mean ringneck parrot--greets you with the "Hail Satan" gesture, you can't...
Forum: Wild Kingdom 05 November 2012, 12:41 PM
Replies: 744
Views: 91,550
Posted By boogers
"Tell the bird that if he did that in the South...

"Tell the bird that if he did that in the South he'd be lynched!"

Said by my mother when a cockatiel practiced wolf whistling while she was on the phone.
Forum: Weird News 03 November 2012, 06:35 PM
Replies: 2
Views: 2,067
Posted By boogers
We used to go to Flint as we were headed for...

We used to go to Flint as we were headed for Canada and we loved staying at the Holiday Inn. Then we learned that the story of Keith Moon driving into the pool was fake and we were disappointed...
Forum: Horrors 03 November 2012, 06:22 PM
Replies: 29
Views: 12,345
Posted By boogers
So I'm going to be in trouble for the fact that...

So I'm going to be in trouble for the fact that instead of handing out bourbon balls (got some crap for that last year) I just handed out bourbon?:)
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