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-   -   Woman draws gun on man in parking lot (http://message.snopes.com/showthread.php?t=92914)

Little Pink Pill 12 November 2015 02:24 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Lainie (Post 1895387)
Apparently the guy was never closer than 10 feet away from her.

Yeah, none of that was to justify her pulling a gun on him. I was originally just wondering if there was a cultural aspect in why Richard, as a man in the UK, might be asked more often for a light than Sue, as a woman in Ontario. I also thought the difference in their perception of motives might be explained by a difference in gender and location.

A Turtle Named Mack 12 November 2015 02:40 AM

Another aspect of the different reaction can be the perceived risk - even if both perceived a potential robbery as one of the possibilities and assessed the same odds of it happening, Richard as a man (very likely larger and stronger than Sue) might feel he could take that risk where Sue might not. I am not sure how either would assess the risk of a concealed weapon (of course, there is less chance of a gun in the UK than in N. America, but I have read stats showing the chances of a knife held be a robber are much greater there - and at close range, a knife would probably be more effective).

Beachlife! 12 November 2015 02:52 AM

I like to take a walk on our river-walk every evening. Lately, my walks have been happening at dusk so I often find myself in low light or after dark in what can be a dark, remote and deserted part of the city. I am always careful to be aware of my surroundings and wary of anyone else I run into with the understanding that they are probably just as harmless as I am.

But, I am also very cognizant of the fact that my presence is a threat to others, especially women. I'm not the type to bother a stranger for anyone reason, but if I were to decide to ask for light, I would definitely chose another man to ask because that would lessen the chance that I would make someone uncomfortable.

Little Pink Pill 12 November 2015 07:27 PM

I really appreciate that kind of courtesy. I've seen men deliberately give me a wide berth in those kind of sketchy surroundings and been thankful for their consideration.

Maybe it's wrong to expect that level of kindness from everyone, but I feel like thoughtful men know they can be intimidating, and try not to add to that behaviors that will make them even more so. I've actually come to expect this, whether from privilege or a social norm, I don't know, and it makes men that take a more casual approach to me all the more alarming.

It works the other way around, too. If I find a child alone in a store, I don't pick them up and terrify them and their parent, I stand a few feet away and wait for someone to come looking. I still sometimes get glared at rather than thanked, but I get it, so it doesn't bother me.

Sooeygun 12 November 2015 08:56 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Little Pink Pill (Post 1895475)
I really appreciate that kind of courtesy. I've seen men deliberately give me a wide berth in those kind of sketchy surroundings and been thankful for their consideration.

Maybe it's wrong to expect that level of kindness from everyone, but I feel like thoughtful men know they can be intimidating, and try not to add to that behaviors that will make them even more so. I've actually come to expect this, whether from privilege or a social norm, I don't know, and it makes men that take a more casual approach to me all the more alarming.

Mr. S walks to work stupid early, around 3:30 or 4:30 am. Because he walks very quickly and is light on his feet, he can kind of sneak up on you. If he is catching up with someone, he makes sure to cough or something so as not to frighten. He mentioned that he has, on occasion, crossed the street earlier than normal to give a lone woman a wider berth.


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