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-   -   Hitman for hire? (http://message.snopes.com/showthread.php?t=4398)

Rshady 03 March 2007 09:10 PM

Hitman for hire?
 
It may have been posted before (though i did try to search for it), But here is a site dedicated to all your assasination needs.

http://hitman.us/main.html

I reckon it's fake.. for obvious reasons, but eh you never know.

Mouse 03 March 2007 09:18 PM

$50,000? I'd do it for $49,000 dollars and 100 pennies.

Note to any FBI agents reading this, I am joking but if you really feel I'm a threat to national security, you can reach me at 1600 Pennsylvania Ave.

cdav1313 03 March 2007 10:21 PM

Seems to be a joke:

Quote:

What have some of our clients had to say about us:

"This guy moved in next door. I didn't like the way he looked in that shirt. So, I called HITMAN. I never saw him again. Or his shirt. Serves him right."

D.G. -- Retired Truck Driver
Quote:

Greatest Hits
Top 10 List -- according to newspaper coverage

1 -- Shrunken Head Identified as That of a Corporate Big Wig

2 -- Unidentified Human Remains Found in Can of Dog Food

3 -- Olympic Medallist Dies in Failed Suicide Attempt

4 -- Used-car Dealer Drowns in Public Restroom

5 -- Prominent Local Politician Dies in a Whorehouse

6 -- Parachutist Falls to his Death as Chute Fails to Open

7 -- Chef Found Roasted (With Stuffing) Inside Own Oven

8 -- Rapist Released on a Technicality Found Technically Dead

9 -- Surgeon Dies in Apparent Self-surgery Attempt

10 -- Poet Commits Suicide by Firing Two Rounds into Own Head
"Join Our Team" shows a "Contract Killing for Dummies" book

Sedorna 04 March 2007 11:04 PM

Yes, it's fake. After all, if you click on the small disclaimer in the lower right hand corner, it tells you flat out it's a parody page.

Rshady 05 March 2007 04:16 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Sedorna (Post 84136)
Yes, it's fake. After all, if you click on the small disclaimer in the lower right hand corner, it tells you flat out it's a parody page.

Ah but that's what they want you to think :P

Deepfrydegg 05 March 2007 04:40 PM

It may be parody, but it is kind of funny

Quote:

1 -- Shrunken Head Identified as That of a Corporate Big Wig

2 -- Unidentified Human Remains Found in Can of Dog Food

3 -- Olympic Medallist Dies in Failed Suicide Attempt
How do you "fail" if you succeed in dying?

Quote:

4 -- Used-car Dealer Drowns in Public Restroom

5 -- Prominent Local Politician Dies in a Whorehouse

6 -- Parachutist Falls to his Death as Chute Fails to Open

7 -- Chef Found Roasted (With Stuffing) Inside Own Oven

8 -- Rapist Released on a Technicality Found Technically Dead
Does that mean he might come back to be "technically" alive?

Quote:

9 -- Surgeon Dies in Apparent Self-surgery Attempt

10 -- Poet Commits Suicide by Firing Two Rounds into Own Head

Quote:

"I had been waiting for a promotion for years. All that was stopping me was the old creep that refused to retire. Then he died unexpectedly of old age."

G.W. -- Chief Executive Officer
Damn, They ARE good, they can even make you older faster!!:lol:
Well worth the price of admission.

Lobo 06 April 2007 06:33 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Mouse (Post 83342)
$50,000? I'd do it for $49,000 dollars and 100 pennies.

Note to any FBI agents reading this, I am joking but if you really feel I'm a threat to national security, you can reach me at 1600 Pennsylvania Ave.

$49,001 ? Cool, a better bargain.

:)
LOL! One of the page sponsors is an anti-hemorroid pill. It says "Imagine life without hemorroids" and right below it is the motto..."Permanent Solutions to Common Problems!"

I thought I'd waken the neighborhood laughing so hard.

Bee 08 April 2007 10:24 PM

Quote:

Assassinations and Contract Killings HITMAN is a cruelty-free organization. None of our services have been tested on animals.
:lol:

Bee


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