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-   -   Things you shouldn't have to tell your pet (http://message.snopes.com/showthread.php?t=76067)

StillandSilent 28 October 2011 08:40 PM

Dearest Ezra-
I know you think you are big man on campus. However, you, as a 7 lb persian, are actually the smallest thing in the house. Stealing turkey necks from a 25 lb basset/whippet mix and a 35 lb coydog is asking for it. The fact that I went rushing into the kitchen screaming 'Noooooo' should have been a clue to this. Please try and survive long enough to be placed in a new home.

Dear Cheshire- You are not pregnant. That sponge? Is not your kitten. Please stop attempting to groom and nurse it. Also, please stop attemtping to attack me every time I walk by your nesting box. It's a 400 sq foot apartment and we need to share
*Chesh is under the care of a vet to figure out why she is having another false pregnancy.

DawnStorm 30 October 2011 01:11 AM

Leela dear, it is not advisable to hang around me when I'm at the desktop computer. The chair has wheels, and I do move around a lot, thus putting kitty tails at great risk.

Spamamander 30 October 2011 01:46 AM

Dearest lil Chaos kitten, you are a carnivore. As you have well demonstrated by the zeal with which you have attacked me over the roast chicken I was eating. Kitties should NOT be enthused by:

Mashed potatoes
Dry Fruit Loops
Sugar cookies

Yet you have gone insane wanting all of these.... especially the loaded flavor mashed potatoes which I had to physically pry you off my my plate to get you away from.

DawnStorm 30 October 2011 02:14 AM

Spamamander--sounds like my cats, especially Leela, my oldest. She'll try anything once, as will my middle cat, Felix. Does your cat like tapioca? :lol:

Horse Chestnut 30 October 2011 03:09 AM

Seems like every pet I've ever had liked potatoes*. It's the universal food!

*Except fish. I've never put potatoes in the aquarium.

Spamamander 30 October 2011 05:01 AM

Hmmm I don't know if Chaos likes tapioca, but my Armani-cat will dive face first into it... :lol:

Lainie 30 October 2011 05:34 PM

Most cats I've known like bread, and several have begged quite insistently every single time I ate any kind of bread product. They tend not to like darker breads like rye and pumpernickel.

A former co-worker had a cat who begged for a piece of fresh, raw spinach every morning. And my Gobi cat, in her later years, would eat just about anything, including some phad thai I once brought home that was almost too spicy for me.

LyndaD 30 October 2011 08:45 PM

GlitchCat loves dried fruit, especially pineapple. She alos likes tomatoe products, such as spaghetti sauce and salsa.

DD1 just posted on FB that she gave her cat a little nibble of
starburst candy. Key spent a good 5 minutes chewing it.:lol:

Cinnamon 31 October 2011 08:43 AM

Tilly, dear heart, I really have no objection to you being on my lap as I eat breakfast - as long as you actually lie down rather than keep getting up and twitching your tail around. I don't appreciate your tail in my food, and cleaning yoghurt out of your tail was not what I wanted first thing in the morning.

Psihala 01 November 2011 03:10 PM

Bear:

I haven't had any cats for a couple of months, and I apologize profusely for oversleeping your feeding time. Standing on my head and pulling my hair to wake me up was very creative. Kudos for coming up with something Klondike never thought of. Don't make it habit, however.

Having said that, you are on a strict feeding schedule that was instituted on the advice of your future vet (you'll get to meet him later this week). Following me into the kitchen every time I go in there isn't automatically going to get you something to eat. Get used to it.

Both kitties:

You are both part of a long line of cats in my life. Unlike you, I wasn't born 2 months ago. I learned to recognize feigned indifference a long time ago.

Love you both,
~Mom

Lainie 01 November 2011 03:12 PM

Are you sure Bear was just pulling your hair? I had a cat who used to chew on mine.

Psihala 01 November 2011 03:25 PM

He may have been doing that initially. In my half-awake state, I didn't even realize he was on my head. But then he moved to my shoulder and PULLED... like some dogs will pull on a toy that they are trying to take from your hand.

That got me up. :lol:

~Psihala

Psihala 01 November 2011 03:58 PM

The toilet paper monster has been vanquished! I'm saved!

~Psihala
(*That didn't take long...)

Buckle Up 01 November 2011 04:13 PM

Pebbles, when you've tried to drink milk from my glass a hundred times and a hundred times been told "no," you've no one to blame but yourself for getting your head stuck inside and walking around with a tall plastic cup on your head meowing for help.

Gayle 01 November 2011 06:08 PM

Elizabeth C. Cat! I do NOT keep $9 a pill antibiotics under the couch. I realize you probably put them there for safe keeping due to the dangerous rattle they make when you knock them off the cabinet, but I need to reduce the deadly rattle by taking them one at a time. You know that scary cough? It will go away if Iím allowed to finish the drugs. Which is kinda hard to do when I canít find them. And yes, that was a sound of great annoyance when I had to get out of bed and take away that package of paint brushes that were trying to take over your domain at 2am. Contrary to popular cat lore, things are safe as houses at 2am. Provided the Human Beast gets to sleep. 2PM. Thatís the time to hunt the martians.

And finally, Iím on to you Skeezix. When I come in to the room just in time to see some tabby butt squeeze under the couch (youíre growing, you know), itís a sure sign that thereís something thatís been put/left/dragged to/batted somewhere it ought not. The jig, companera, is up.

Kitsune27 03 November 2011 06:59 AM

Gingham, you need to eat your dental chews if you don't want to have to go to the vet to get your teeth cleaned.
I'm trying to help you, because I know going to the vet freaks you out, but you need to work with me, so eat your chews.

zman977 05 November 2011 10:00 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by kit_n_caboodle (Post 1529809)
When playing fetch, you have to bring the toy much closer to me so I can throw it again. Dropping it several feet away means you have to wait until I have time to get up and get it.

Cats are terrible at playing fetch.


Our golden retriever Luke does something similar. He'll bring the ball back and just stand there looking confused as to what to do next. He's five and has played fetch for years. He should have figured it out by now especially after seeing our lab Maggie drop the ball when told to do so. For some reason Luke is not getting the idea that he has to drop the ball in order for us to throw it again

Horse Chestnut 05 November 2011 12:43 PM

Benny the new kitten, please leave the printer alone. Benny, no, leave the printer alone. Benny! Get off the printer! Benny quit tha... (Horrible crashing sound as new printer hits floor.)

I know I have been remiss about posting new kitten pictures, and he is very likely to go all 'splody. At this point I'm almost hoping he does. I know the other two cats would volunteer to light the fuse.

Psihala 07 November 2011 04:01 PM

Enoch, you don't have to wake me by playing with my hair--- that's Bear's job. Also, I'm perfectly willing to let you be the rambunctious kitten you are, but I'm warning you: my face is off limits--always.

Both kittehs:

Can I kindly request that you limit the leg-climbing to occasions when I'm actually wearing something on my legs?

~Psihala
(*Who always wakes up with my hair looking like I slept in the dryer...)

greenfrog78 07 November 2011 04:17 PM

Dear Squeaky,
Please be advised, laundry baskets full of clean clothes are NOT cat beds.

The Staff


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